Chapter 35

Aurora

I feel warm fingertips on my cheek, brushing down my lower lip, and when I recognize Jaxson’s smell, I immediately jump up, alert. My body isn’t ready for that movement. I hit the floor, out of a bed that I don’t recognize, and my stomach churls painfully.

Whatever is in my system, isn’t done with me yet.

I stumble toward the sink across the room, my tongue so dry it’s rough in my mouth, and I pull myself to a stand so I can flip on the faucet and let the cold water run out into the sink. I splash it all over my face, tipping a handful down my throat, and try to make sense of my surroundings while the room spins endlessly in my eyes.

There are footsteps behind me, and I can’t pinpoint why, but I expect Xander to burst into the room and taunt me with more pain, something that has been replying in the dark laps of dreams in my head. I turn expectantly, spinning around too fast and instead falling back onto the old, dusty floors.

Luke moves closer, his turquoise eyes pacing down at me below, reaching to help me stand back up.

I flinch back, my breath labored, my stomach cramping.

“Little one, take it easy, it’s me,” he hums, kneeling a few paces away from me.

I try to shake the fear from my mind, the confusion, but it doesn’t work. None of this makes sense. “Where is Jaxson?” is all I can manage to say, feeling his touch just moments before I jolted awake.

His eyes drop to the floor, his hands folding over in his lap. “He’s at the palace, Aurora.”

“So, where are we?”

“We are not at the palace,” he says simply, shaking his head. “You’ve been out for a few days, little one. I can imagine your confused. Maybe we should talk this out over breakfast. Okay?”

My legs shiver at the thought of moving, but it’s Luke, and my wolf is happy to oblige anything he offers. He reaches a hand out and lets me maneuver to stand with his help, my balance atrocious. I lean on his arm, and we walk from the small, dusty room, the smell like water has encroached every one of the wood floors panels and walls, making this whole place wreak with humidity.

There’s a small kitchen, not big enough for us both to enter, with a tiny living space nearby where a chair and a small sectional sit. I plop down on the couch, looking around the immaculately petite cabin, unsure how I have gotten here in the first place.

Luke rustles through the cabinets, trying to throw something to eat together, but even with the pang of hunger in my stomach nagging at me, I still can’t seem to shake the confusion of why we are here and more importantly, what happened at the gala.

The last thing I recall is sitting out in the orchard, feeling the weight of the world on my back.

“Luke, please, just tell me; what is going on?” I curl my legs to my chest, unable to hide the fact that my body is shaking all over, my wolf feeling weak as well, and this patience game isn’t working.

He hesitates in the kitchen, his eyes gray and looking faraway. I’ve seen that look before. It’s the same look he gave me the day before his twentieth birthday. I didn’t know it at the time but seeing the gray of his eyes shift now only reminds me that he had a bad feeling about me not being his mate, and he feels the same pressure now to tell me, even if it’ll hurt me.

“Please,” I beg, tipping my forehead to my knees to cry into my lap, if the moment arises where I happen to weep. “Just tell me, Luke.”

He stops his menial, useless tasks and moves into the living room, taking a seat nearby. “Well, tell me what you remember, and I will fill in the rest.”

I swallow hard, a headache consuming my thoughts, pulsing in my temples. “The blue moon gala,” I say, shaking my head. “I was out in the orchard. I kept hearing people talk about me and—and—” I don’t last long without breaking a few tears. “I don’t know what happened.”

“You took something to drink,” he says, his eyes darting through mine as I tip my head up. I can read the disappointment in his furrowed brow from here. “You took a drink from a stranger, Aurora. It was poison. It almost killed you too, and that explains why we’re here now. You are dead,” he says simply. My eyes go wide, still filled to the brim with tears.

“No, no,” he hums, shaking his head now. “I don’t mean it literally. You’re not hallucinating, little one. Once we were able to revive you, we decided it was best to keep the guise that you were dead, so Jaxson could get to the bottom of who tried to kill you from within the palace.”

I have to hold my arm to my chest, the fast beats of my heart aching me to no end. “How long will it take? What is he doesn’t find out who did it?”

“He will,” he says, sure of himself, so sure of Jaxson. “Plus, this way if Xander hears the news spread that you have died, it may draw him out of hiding and Jaxson can handle that mess as well.”

I shake my head, not sure if I believe it. “What do I do until then, just wait here? I can’t see Jaxson. He can’t come visit?”

Somberly, he shakes his head. “Jaxson would be followed by warriors, some of which could be working against your mating union. He has to keep the appearance that you’re dead, Aurora. I will try to be in contact with him a little, but not much.”

I look around the dingy cabin, my heart hurting at the thought of not being around Jaxson every morning and every night. I won’t get to feel him hold me, try to make me feel safer in his arms, and I won’t get to be trained to fight. If anything happens out here to me, I’ll be just as vulnerable as I was before when Xander found me.

I take a shallow breath, still reeling from this information, my wolf so desperately weak but I purse the idea anyways, needing to speak to Jaxson.

Jaxson, are you there?

I hear a pause in the link, my head hurting as nothing reaches back.

Yes, sweetheart, I’m here for you. Are you okay? Are you hurt?

I break down harder, hearing his voice so perfectly crisp in my head. We haven’t had the best times since he found me to be his mate, but for some odd reason, even feeling the pain of knowing he deserves better, I can’t help but miss his touch.

I’m not hurt, I say, clinging to my sides, to my stomach, like my threads may break and I’ll be exposed for everything I really am on the inside, which is mostly made up of fear and regret.

Don’t cry, he pleads, aware that I’m an emotion mess. It will be okay. You will be back here in no time. Just let me fix this, Aurora. I will fix this.

I feel the link go cold, my body and mind exhausted, and I slump back into the couch. I sniffle a cry, not necessarily missing the palace and the responsibilities of being the future Alpha’s mate, but more so just feeling like even the place I am fated to be at, with the wolf I’m fated to be with, isn’t safe for me.

As of now, I belong nowhere, with no one.

“Please,” Luke begs, taking a seat on the couch next to me, his hand weighing heavy on my side. “Don’t cry, Aurora. This is all temporary. You will be back home soon.”

“Home,” I blurt, the image in my head of my parent’s house, the place I grew up.

He must realize that, too, correcting himself a moment later. “Back with Jaxson, I meant.”

With little life left in my soul, I allow myself to break into heavy sobs. I shouldn’t be here, with Luke, and I shouldn’t be pretending to be a princess with Jaxson. I now know that I belong nowhere, with no one, and the overwhelming feeling of being rejected weighs heavily on my heart.

Luke brushes a hand down my side, trying to sooth me.

I give in, sitting up quick and throwing my arms around his shoulders. He embraces me back, tighter, and presses his head into my neck, each warm sigh of relief making my wolf hum. I would be lying if I said I didn’t feel for Luke still, but my wolf still feels so attached to Jaxson. I feel as if I’ve now lost them both, for good, and the man I loved and the man I am fated two are different beings, both just out of reach from my heart.

Xander was right. I’m a useless mutt and I can’t pretend to be anything else.

“I’ll make some breakfast,” Luke says, pulling away.

I nod, wiping my face dry, and looking up long enough to catch a set of light green eyes in the woods through the window. They are frozen in fear, weighed down heavy in pain, and I feel the same sense of rejection in them that I feel in my own.

Mary brushes her long, blond hair aside, something so stoic and pained in her gaze. She may be mated to Luke by fate, but he and I will always be close to one another in a way they may never be, same as the way Jaxson and I will be. Luke holds me and loves me by choice, despite fate, while fate is the only thing that keeps him with Mary and me with Jaxson.

I don’t want her upset, same as I wouldn’t want Jaxson upset, but I can’t help that my heart hasn’t healed from the day I watched him take her into his arms, into a fervent kiss, and left me outside watching with a pained heart.

I see myself in Mary, in her envy and in her resentment.

That must be why I look away from the sight of her all together.