Chapter 10: Losing Control?
Severin's POV
The torches in the east wing corridor threw our shadows long across the black stone walls — hers and mine, tangled together.
She was almost asleep in my arms.
Her silver hair had fallen loose across my forearm, the strands brushing my skin with every step.
Her breathing had gone soft and slow, carrying the sweetness of the honey wine and underneath it, her own scent — the one I couldn't get out of my head.
I want her.
I walked faster.
Her door was unlatched.
I pushed it open with my knee and carried her into the dark, setting her down on the bed. I tucked the blanket around her, one layer, then another.
She stirred. Turned her face into the pillow and let out a small, satisfied sound, then went completely still.
She slept like a creature that had never learned to be afraid.
I didn't stand up right away.
In the dark, my eyes found the side of her neck.
Nothing there. No mark. Just bare skin.
My teeth ached with a want I couldn't name and refused to act on. My wolf lunged toward that emptiness, and I caught it by the throat and held it.
She almost marked you.
I stood up sharply and turned for the door.
I don't want to leave.
I kept walking.
Then her voice came from behind me.
Soft. Thick with wine, drifting up from the edge of sleep.
"Are you coming back tomorrow?"
My hand stopped against the door.
Firelight bled through the gap at the threshold. I stood with my back to her.
"Oden will come," I said. "Someone will bring your breakfast in the morning. You'll be looked after."
A displeased sound from the bed. "I don't want Oden."
"He's better at this than I am."
"I don't want better." Her voice blurred further, no pretense left in it at all. "I want you."
I said nothing.
"Don't go, Severin."
I closed my eyes. Breathed in once, slowly.
Then I turned around and walked back to the bed, bending down until I could see her face in the dark.
Her eyes were closed. Her lashes cast faint shadows against her cheeks.
Her mouth had curved down slightly at the corners, like she was dissatisfied even in sleep.
Maybe she was only dreaming out loud.
"Little wolf," I said quietly. "What else do you want?"
She smiled — sudden and unguarded, the corners of her mouth lifting. "Honey cake."
I couldn't stop the low sound that escaped me. Something close to a laugh.
"All right. I'll have some ready for you tomorrow. Now sleep."
She made a small pouty noise, pulled the blanket tighter around herself, and went quiet.
I stood in the dark for another moment. Then I walked out and pulled the door shut behind me.
I stayed in the corridor.
My back found the stone wall. I raised my right hand and pressed two fingers against the side of my neck — the exact place where her teeth had pressed in.
She had barely bitten down. It was nothing. It shouldn't have registered at all.
But my body said otherwise.
Fated.
The word surfaced from somewhere deep, like something carved into bone.
I remained still until my wolf finally settled under my control. Then I pushed away from the wall and headed for the rooms on the other side of the castle.
Oden was waiting outside the door. He bowed without a word when he saw me.
I stopped at the threshold. "Send for Aera."
He lowered his head. "Yes, my lord."
Aera arrived quickly. She came through the door with her usual composure, let her gaze travel over me once, and smiled. "You smell different tonight, my lord."
She rose onto her toes, angling toward my neck.
I caught her by the shoulder and held her back.
She stilled. The smile faded. She stepped back and dropped her eyes. "My lord. Forgive me."
She moved to the bed and lay down. I moved toward her.
And then her scent hit me.
My wolf recoiled so hard it felt like a physical blow — a sound rising in my chest, low and disgusted.
Aera's scent was smooth. Neutral. Inoffensive. It had never bothered me before.
But underneath it, still clinging to my senses, was something else entirely.
The warmth of a different breath against my neck. The faint, maddening weight of silver hair across my arm.
I pulled back and stood in silence.
"Go," I said. "I don't need you tonight."
Aera said nothing. She stood, walked to the door, and let herself out.
I went to the bathing chamber and stripped off my clothes and stepped into the pool.
The hot springs in this wing were all connected, fed by the same underground spring.
She had been laughing in those waters not long ago, and the thought sat in my chest like a coal.
I reached down and tried to deal with what was left of the problem.
Her scent surrounded me. I don't know how long it took. Eventually, the tension in my body finally eased.
I pressed my fist against the stone edge of the pool. The stone cracked.
It was an accident.
She had no place in my life.
Whatever my wolf thought, that wouldn't change.
I repeated it to myself.
Finally, I climbed out, pulled on a loose deerskin, and walked back to the main room.
The fire had burned down to a steady orange glow.
I stood in front of it for a long time before I spoke.
"Oden."
The door opened.
"Contact the Moonlight Abbey." I kept my eyes on the flames. "Tell them to prepare a clean room. She is to receive full care starting tomorrow."
"Of course. Any specific requirements?"
"She likes sweet things." I paused. "Match her meals to her preferences. Honey cake with every meal, from now on."
"Yes, my lord."
He didn't leave.
After a moment, he said calmly, "My lord, she seems to be different around you. In fact—"
"I know."
"Then why—"
I turned toward him. "Oden. Have you ever seen me lose control in front of someone?"
He didn't answer.
"No," I said. "Never. Not once." A pause. "Until tonight."
He exhaled slowly.
"She's too young," I said, quieter now. "She isn't suited to be my—"
The word didn't make it out.
"Have a horse team ready to depart before midday tomorrow."
Oden bowed. "As you command, my lord."
He crossed to the door. His hand touched the handle.
"One more thing."
He stopped.
"Tomorrow morning." The words came out like I was pulling them through stone. "Have an extra honey cake sent with her breakfast."
A beat of silence.
"Yes, my lord."
