Chapter 3

I didn't expect to lose again.

I found Dane in the front room that evening. Odessa was curled on the couch under a blanket, and he was building up the fire for her.

I set the dark bottle on the table between them.

"Smell it."

Dane frowned. He picked it up and pulled the cork, and I watched his nostrils flare.

"That's my pain tincture." Odessa pushed herself up on one elbow, bewildered. "The healer makes it for me. There's a little wolfsbane in it. It's the only thing that dulls the cramping when my wolf..." She trailed off and looked at me. "Tamsin, did you go through my bag?"

"She told me herself," I said. "She doses her tea every day so she'll look sick. She's not dying, Dane. There's nothing wrong with her wolf."

He went very still.

"Listen to what you're saying." His voice was ice. "Her sister died in my arms. Now you're telling me she'd fake the same death to my face?"

"I'm telling you the truth!"

Odessa's eyes swam. She reached over and took the bottle from his hand.

"It's all right, Dane. If Tamsin thinks it's poison..."

She tipped it back and drank.

"Odessa, no!"

He lunged. Too late. She'd swallowed half the bottle.

For a second nothing happened. Then she doubled over, gagging, her whole body jerking against the couch.

Dane hauled her up and forced her over the hearth until she brought it back up, shouting for his Beta at the top of his lungs. When she finally went limp against him, gasping, he turned and looked at me.

"Look what you pushed her to."

"I didn't push her to anything. She did that to herself, the same way she's been doing it all year—"

"Stop." He was shaking. "This morning you went at her wolf. Now this. What's next, Tamsin? Are you going to tell me the pup isn't mine?"

It hit like a slap.

"Dane—" I reached for his hand.

He pulled it away.

"Linnea drew the silver out of me with her own blood." His voice broke on her name. "She died so I could stand here. The least I owe her is her sister. Why can't you understand that?"

Odessa lifted her head from his shoulder, wiping her mouth.

"Don't fight over me," she whispered. "I understand why she's angry. I'd hate me too."

She looked at me with wet, cloudy eyes.

"I'm sorry, Tamsin. I never wanted to come between you. I'll be gone soon. You won't have to wait much longer."

I'll be gone soon.

She said it so softly. Like someone who'd already made her peace with it.

Dane's arms tightened around her.

"Don't say that."

"It's true." She gave him a small, brave smile. "The healer says I might not even get to hold the pup. But I'm not scared. At least I got to see you happy."

"Odessa—"

"Maybe I should go back to Ashfen." She eased out of his arms. "I'm only making things worse up here. You two matter more than where I rest."

"You're not going anywhere." His voice was final. "This is the best place for you."

He turned to me, and what was in his eyes made me take a step back.

"Five years," he said quietly. "I thought you were kinder than this."

I opened my mouth. Nothing came out.

What was left to say? He'd already chosen.

His Beta burst in with the healer behind him. Dane lifted Odessa and carried her down the hall, murmuring to her the whole way.

I stood alone by the fire, with the empty bottle on its side on the table.

The bead vial was still in my pocket. I closed my hand around it and didn't take it out.

Late that night, he knocked on the spare-room door.

"She'll be all right. The healer gave her something to settle her stomach."

I didn't look up.

He sat on the edge of the narrow bed and took my hand.

"I know it's been hard. I haven't been fair to you." His voice softened. "But I haven't forgotten. The rehearsal's still on, the morning before the moon, at the altar. Just like we planned."

His thumb moved over my knuckles.

"After the pup's born, she goes. Then it's only us. I swear it."

He kissed my forehead and went out.

I stared at the closed door.

He'd picked her tears over my truth, again.

Fine.

The Elder's draught would be ready on the night of that rehearsal. Let him keep believing her. I wouldn't be here to see how it ended.

The morning of the rehearsal, the altar looked exactly the way I'd pictured it for five years.

A ring of standing stones at the top of the ridge, right on the cliff edge, with the lake spread out silver far below. The names of every Luna of Ironmere were carved around the inside of the ring. Mine was the newest, the cuts still pale.

My gown lay folded on the altar stone.

Dane was waiting in the center of the circle.

"You're going to be the most beautiful Luna this pack has ever had."

For one second, I let myself believe him.

Then I heard footsteps behind me.

Odessa stood at the top of the path in white, one hand on her belly.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I just wanted to see it. Once."