Chapter 36

By the time Julian picks me up for our date, I’m feeling good about my decision. Grace and Claudia had a fun day at the carnival, and both were completely exhausted by the time we returned. Grace had eaten an early dinner and gone straight to bed.

It has been so long since Julian and I have gone on a proper date that I’m starting to feel excited. I choose my clothes with care, settling on a little black dress I haven’t worn in a while and a pair of low heels.

I head downstairs at exactly eight o’clock and find Julian and Adrian at the door waiting for me. This feels like déjà vu, and I feel a stab of panic at the reminder of the last time I had both of them waiting for me downstairs exactly like this. Only this time, neither are in tuxedos and Adrian’s button-down shirt is rolled up at the sleeves and his tie is missing. The sign that he is in for the night.

I staunch my panic and remind myself that I’m only going to dinner with Julian. No other werewolves are invited and we can talk, just the two of us.

I bid Adrian goodnight and as I leave, he looks like he wants to say something, but he only wishes us a good time and closes the door after us.

Julian takes me to a nice restaurant I would never have imagined us going to all of those weeks ago. Back when he was hiding who he was.

“Are you sure?” I ask as he opens the car door for me. I know what it means for him to use his family’s money.

“We deserve a nice date, and you need to be spoiled a little for once.” He says offering me his arm and escorting me inside.

My apprehension fades and my heart warms at the words and the gesture. Here is the sweet man I first met.

He pulls out my chair and orders us drinks. I’m a little nervous at first. I don’t want to talk about werewolves, mates, or marking. I just want to be here with him for a little while and pretend all of those things don’t exist.

It doesn’t last though. After words about our days and where I regal him with tales of the shenanigans two little girls were party to at the local carnival, he reaches across to clasp my hand in his.

“Lily, I know these last few weeks have been rough. I know I could have done a better job at being there for you and I’m sorry I pushed you last night.” His apology sounds sincere, and I feel any residual resentment crack. “I just got so amped up with the moon and with you knowing everything, I just couldn’t let go of the thought that we didn’t have to wait. I know we love each other, and the wolf side was fixed on the idea of claiming you as my mate.”

I cringe a little at those words and he gives me a sad smile. “I know how that sounds. It’s just our language. You would be claiming me too. Isn’t that what marriage is anyway?”

I suppose he’s right. It’s just another way of saying the same thing.

“I just need time, Julian.” I say and his face falls a little. “This is a lot and the idea of basically getting married right now was too much to process. I just need a little time to understand things and what it all means.”

“But you aren’t saying no, right?” He says, sounding hopeful. “You’re asking to wait.”

I give him a smile. “I’m not saying no. I’m just saying, not right now.”

The look he gives me is so full of joy that I have no choice but to smile back. It is the most productive conversation we’ve had in weeks. As the date goes on, he tells me about the friends I’ve never met and the events I’ll get to attend now.

By the time we are leaving. I’m feeling a little more hopeful about the future of this relationship. I know one date won’t change everything, and I’m still more than a little apprehensive, but it’s a start.

Finally, I manage to muster the courage to ask him the question I’ve wanted to ask all night. “How do you know I’m your mate?”

He stills and gives me a serious look. “Lily, the moment I met you, I just knew. It’s an instinct thing. When we find our mate, we just know that it’s them. Sometimes it takes a little while to click into place, but with you it was instant. There is no one else in the world for me. Only you.”

I reach up to kiss him lightly. I’m still not satisfied with the answer, but he tried to explain and it felt honest. Maybe it’s because I’m not a werewolf, so I don’t feel what he feels. I want to though. I want to experience that kind of knowing. I remember Claudia’s parents and wonder what it was like for them. Did Claudia’s mother feel the same thing her mate did?

Maybe I needed another woman to explain it.

We walk outside the restaurant to where the car is waiting when Julian’s name is called. We turn to find a stunning looking woman on the arm of a man going inside. They smile and the man reaches to shake Julian’s hand.

He introduces me, and both look at me with polite smiles that don’t reach their eyes. Neither extend their hand to me, so I keep my grip on Julian’s arm.

“We look forward to your party.” The man says, clearly only speaking to Julian.

“It’s been too long since you have had one.” The woman adds, also ignoring me entirely.

“Yes, I’m looking forward to introducing Lily as my mate.” He says, smiling at me. I return it, though it’s hard to ignore how both of the faces in front of us turn icy.

“Yes, well, it should be interesting.” The woman says. “We certainly haven’t had a human present for a while. Not since the ceremony anyway. Hopefully, now that there’s no need to hide our nature, we won’t have any women running off again and getting themselves in trouble. No need to ruin a good party with dramatics.”

The comment grinds my nerves. She speaks about me like I’m not here and she’s definitely talking about me. Julian just chuckles a little and pats the hand on his arm. It’s so condescending I want to slap him. But that would just prove the woman’s point, so I refrain.

“Good to see you both.” Julian says and excuses us to the car.

As soon as we are inside and out of sight, I glare at him. “Good to see you both? That woman talks about me like that, and that’s what you choose to say?” I accuse him.

“They’re snobs. Ignore them. Besides, you did run off and get hurt. It’s bound to be remembered for a while.” He says and then sighs when my face twists with anger. Like he knows he just said the wrong thing.

“Great to know you have my back.” I say, my voice dripping with sarcasm. “Who are those people anyway?”

“Noble family. They’re close with Vanessa’s.” He answers. I wonder why he needed to explain who they were in relation to her.

“Vanessa.” I scoff her name. “That woman. What’s your relationship with her?”

He whips his head to me. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, she talks like the two of you are practically betrothed. She’s constantly telling me you’re meant to be together. Why does she think that?”

“I have no idea.” He says dismissively. “There’s nothing between us. You have no reason to be jealous.”

I don’t have the heart to tell him that it’s not jealousy. It’s just annoyance. I really dislike the woman, and I can’t say that about a lot of people.

I consider pushing him for more, but the evening has gone so well. I don’t want to spoil it with yet another fight. Instead, I just take his hand and try to forget the ugly part of the evening.

Julian walks me to the door and kisses me goodnight. He looks like he’s waiting for me to ask him to stay, but I don’t want him to. I have too much to think about and frankly, I’m not interested in sex right now.

Heading inside, I decide tea is in order if I’m going to sleep. I walk into the kitchen and find Adrian at the counter pouring some scotch over ice.

“How was your date?” He asks, putting the ice away.

“It was fine.” I say as I head to the cabinet for tea.

I ignore how my body heats and my heart skips a few beats the closer I get to him. I can feel his eyes on me, waiting for me to tell him more.

I don’t. I can’t. Just a minute ago, I turned Julian down. Now my body is flaring with Adrian just standing in the room. It’s not fair.

Avoiding Adrian’s eyes and, even though I want nothing more than to stay and just talk to him, I take my tea and walk from the room without another word.

I have to do my part. If I want things to work with Julian, I have to stay away from Adrian. He’s my boyfriend’s father. Nothing more. And that’s how I have to see him.