Chapter 138

Theodore’s POV

It was a little pathetic. I was a little pathetic. But if I was being honest, I was more than willing to be even more pathetic for Violet.

For now, I was staring at the paper in the kitchen, not reading at all while I pathetically listened for the doorbell. Bennett’s grocery deliveries had been coming in weekly – every Saturday at noon – and I hadn’t received another note from my wife since the first one hidden in the recipe book.

But I hoped each Saturday for the second one.

This was the third Saturday since Eva was so violently thrust into our lives. Three weeks without Violet was starting to wear me down.

From my peripherals, I saw Dahlia notice the nervous jiggling of my leg from where she sat across from me. I said nothing, only continued to stare at the paper.

“Unrest is growing across the country,” she said.

“Huh?” I looked up from the paper, one ear still listening for the doorbell. It was almost noon.

Reaching over the paper in my hands, Dahlia pointed at the article I was pretending to read with a bold headline of, “Unrest Among Alphas”. I met Dahlia’s questioning gaze as I realized she had just caught me not reading.

Before she could ask any questions out loud though, the doorbell rang. I rose so quickly and enthusiastically that I almost toppled over my chair, needing to reach back to catch it. A quick look at Dahlia, and I knew she suspected something was up.

My impatience being away from Violet was making me sloppy.

“Groceries,” I muttered before making my way to the front door – excruciatingly slowly to avoid drawing any more attention to myself.

Unfortunately, Riley beat me to the door. If I didn’t know for sure that he was a spy, I’d think he was trying to prove himself as my next butler.

Riley greeted Bennett by name since he had shown up enough for Riley to recognize him. Hearing me come up behind him, Riley abandoned the open door to let me by, making his way back upstairs. I guess that meant Bennett was enough of a regular that Riley was now writing off his visits.

I greedily received the box of groceries that Bennett handed me. I hardly looked at him, I was so excited to search for a note from my mate.

“And how are you, Alpha Nightshade?” I paused in the doorway, realizing how impolite I had been, not even acknowledging Bennett’s existence. I gave him an apologetic smile.

“I’m doing well, Bennett, thank you. How are you?” He was so good at keeping up the charade that we didn’t know each other outside him delivering my groceries.

But Bennett shrugged, sighing, like something was wrong, and my heart sank. “I’m okay, just a bit of family stress.” Then he looked at me pointedly, and I knew.

There would be no note from Violet in this box. Her message was being delivered orally.

I adjusted the box in my arms, preparing to stand here as long as it took to hear what Bennett had to say. Keeping my tone polite, but sympathetic, I was careful not to betray my desperation to know what was going on with Violet as I said, “Oh?”

“It’s my cousin,” he shrugged again. “Her husband is away on business for an unknown amount of time, and she can’t figure out how to get the news to him that’s she’s pregnant.”

It felt like the floor dropped out from under me, and the box of groceries slipped from my grasp. Bennett lunged forward to catch it, and as we reached to keep it from spilling together, our eyes locked. Bennett’s gaze was full of sympathy, but mostly he was glaring at me to pull it together.

He was right. If any of Owen’s spies put together that he was referring to Violet…

I shut down that thought as I reached for the aloof asshole I had played so well all my life.

“Maybe these deliveries need to be packed in sturdier boxes,” I accused loudly enough to cover my ass.

Thankfully, Bennett played along. “Of course, Alpha Nightshade. That’s my fault.”

I calmed my tone. “It’s alright, Bennett. We’re all allowed a mistake here and there.” I looked at him with the fear and excitement I was only able to remove from my voice.

A small, congratulatory smile slipped up the side of Bennett’s face before he hid it from view. “Thank you, Alpha Nightshade. I’ll see you next week.”

“Good luck to your cousin!” I called behind him as he trotted down the front steps. I closed the door behind me, staring down at the box as I made my way back to the kitchen.

I barely glanced up enough to ascertain that Dahlia was the only one there before dropping the box of groceries on the counter and quietly muttering, “Cover for me.”

Because Dahlia knew me well enough to recognize the intense impassivity of my face betrayed by my clenched fists and wild eyes. She knew that only two things would allow me the release I needed, and one of those was not an option right now. She only answered, “Done,” before opening the first series of secret doors I hadn’t dared open since the arrival of Eva and the spies.

Once I was hidden behind the first door, I kept going through the rest, pushing myself to keep moving, not allowing the feelings to overtake me until I was out of the house. Then I was locking the last door behind me, falling to my knees on the grass softened by the day’s ongoing drizzle. Droplets of water fell onto my head, my shoulders, and the bottoms of my feet as I kneeled before the forest.

What I really wanted was to kneel before my mate.

My pregnant mate.

More than anything I was thrilled. The idea of raising a child with Violet was by far the most romantic notion I had ever considered. A life, a future with her – I wanted that above all else.

But I was also enraged. Furious that Owen’s scheme kept me apart from Violet during what should be the most exciting time of our life. Angry that I couldn’t go to her, couldn’t hold her, couldn’t kiss her on the lips and then on her belly where our little miracle was kept safe.

And terrified. My entire life, Owen had made it his mission to keep me from the crown just short of killing me – though I didn’t doubt that if it came to it, he would resort to that, too. But now I was no longer next in line for the crown.

My child was. And that made them Owen’s new target.

Beside myself, overwhelmed by competing emotions, I ripped into my wolf form, tearing into the woods in a desperate attempt to let off some steam. I felt like if I didn’t release at least a fraction of what I was feeling, it would consume me whole.

I didn’t think, only ran, the miles slowly shucking the burden of this news until it was not my burden alone to bear, but the forest’s as well, happily willing to share the load with me.

As I finally began to slow, I realized that I had absentmindedly made my way to the cabin. It had always been my sanctuary, and my positive association with it had only grown after Violet’s and my honeymoon here.

As I approached the edge of the property, about to shift back into my human form, I scented smoke. Looking up, I saw it was coming from the chimney.

Someone was already here.