Chapter 119

Evelyn

The road stretched endlessly before us, a ribbon of gray winding for the foreseeable distance. In fact, it was more of a path than a road, travel-worn as it snaked through dark forests and shadowed hills. We followed it doggedly, mostly silent as we continued forward while the hours ticked by.

The air grew cooler with every mile, and the weight of silence between Logan and me felt as heavy as humidity. Eventually, the day changed and darkened, and still, the northern road stretched on and on, as did our silence.

We’d ridden hard since sunrise, and now, the day of travel was coming to a close. By the following afternoon, we would be in the northern pack’s territory.

When the light began to die and our horses grew restless, we finally stopped in a small clearing sheltered by tall trees with ample foliage for coverage. Logan handled starting the fire while I hobbled and tended to the horses.

When I returned to the fire, I was rubbing feeling back into my hands. The farther we traveled north, the colder it seemed to get. The night promised to be chilly.

I sank down onto the blanket beside him, tugging my cloak tighter against the stirring wind.

“Tomorrow, we will cross into their lands,” I murmured. It was the first time we had spoken in hours, and our first acknowledgement of what was to come when we arrived in the northern pack’s location. We had set out so reactively that we had hardly even discussed a plan.

Logan’s jaw tightened as he stirred the pot he had set above the fire. Inside, a stew was just beginning to simmer. “Then we’ll handle it,” he said. “Together.”

I let out a slow breath, watching tongues of the fire ripple restlessly. I felt a similar unrest mirrored in me as I looked on.

Together. How long had I waited for him to say a similar sentiment? I had patiently waited, hoping one day he would see me as he did now: as an equal, as someone worthy of his attention and appreciation.

The silence stretched, taut as a bowstring, until I couldn’t bear it any longer. “Logan… where do we stand?”

His hand stilled. For a moment, he didn’t answer and simply stared at the simmering stew, which was becoming increasingly fragrant. Then he looked at me, and the firelight cast shadows across the planes of his face.

“You tell me,” he said quietly.

“I’m asking you.”

“I don’t want to mispeak.”

“You won’t,” I promised. “You won’t as long as you tell me the truth.”

He took a moment to find the words.“You’ve always been… everything. It took me too long to see that, I think. I was distracted, but that’s not necessarily an excuse. But now I see you, all of you, so clearly. And I want you to forgive me, but I won’t force it, so I’m… waiting on your next move.”

The words hit deep, unraveling something knotted inside me. “I wanted someone to stand with me. To believe in me.”

His throat worked as if the next words would cost him. “I’m sorry I didn’t feel as strongly from the start, but I do believe in you, Evelyn. I believe in you more than I believe in myself.”

“But yet you accused me of those horrible things.”

His face contorted into a wince. “I think… I think I let fear get in the way there.”

My chest ached. “Fear of what?”

“Of surrendering to something so powerful,” he said simply. “Of loving you so much that if you walked away, I wouldn’t survive it. So I pushed you away first. ”

The honesty in his voice warmed me more than the flames. I stared at him, heart pounding, and the anger, the hurt, the feeling of betrayal all fell away. I was tired of fighting it.

I leaned in before I could stop myself, my lips brushing his in a tentative kiss that turned fierce the moment he cupped my face.

All the tension between us broke like a dam. One kiss became another, and then I was in his arms, flush against his warmth. I let him undress me, entirely unaware of the cold now. I was warm in his arms, and my skin felt hot wherever he stroked. All of my clothes were immediately too tight and restrictive.

So I pulled off a layer and he did as well, until we were bared to each other. I gasped at the majesty of him, this body I loved so dearly being exposed entirely to me. I touched him with reverence. Here, now, he was all mine.

He breathed a rough whisper of my name on my lips, the beginnings of a moan collecting even at this grazing contact. Just those mere touches could elicit such strong responses.

When we came together, it was with a desperation that felt like coming home. I arched into him, feeling myself surrender as I allowed him to guide our movements. I was utterly at a loss, succumbing completely to my mounting pleasure.

My nails dug into his back, desperate to cling to something, anything, like I might be swept away in the feeling if I didn’t anchor myself. His hands burrowed into the earth beside my head, similarly desperate to hold on.

“Look at me,” he growled, losing control as his rhythm became more frantic, his pleasure mounting. I met his eyes and saw the same intensity I felt reflected back at me.

When we reached our peak, it was so intense that we cried out synchronously. I felt my limbs spasming before they became heavy and limp. I was spent, and when he rolled off of me, I knew he was too.

I lay there, panting, and was surprised to note that I didn’t feel like fleeing this time. I was settled and relaxed as I lay there, wrapped in his arms beneath the stars. I felt whole and safe in a way I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in so long.

Logan traced slow circles on my skin. Everywhere his finger brushed, he left goosebumps in his wake. His voice was low and husky when he finally spoke.

“Evelyn… I’ve been thinking.”

“Uh oh,” I said teasingly, turning to see him more clearly.

“We should complete the bond.”

My breath caught. I searched his eyes for any hint of jest, but there was none. He looked deeply serious.

The suggestion should have startled me, but instead, a strange calm settled over me. The idea of being bound to him, truly, for life didn’t frighten me like I thought it would. In fact, I felt a wash of something like relief at the idea.

“I…” I swallowed hard. “I’m not opposed.”

His brow lifted slightly, surprise flickering across his features before softening into something tender.

“But,” I added, pressing my palm against his chest. I felt his heart racing beneath my hand. “Not yet. Not until Scott is dealt with. I won’t be willing until the threat of him is gone. I can’t give myself to anything else completely while everything hangs in the balance.”

He studied me for a long moment, then nodded slowly. “After Scott, then.” A smile spread across his face. “I can wait.”

“After Scott,” I echoed, though even as I said it, I knew the bond between us had already begun to feel inevitable. It was like the pull of the moon on the tide, impossible to resist.

And under that starlit sky, with his arms holding me tight, I realized that for the first time in days, I wasn’t thinking about war or politics. It was just him. Just us.

Only he could have that effect on me.

I took a deep breath. “I think the stew is ready.”

He laughed and kissed my forehead.