Chapter 3

On Wednesday morning, Julian left before the sun was up.

Sienna's project had closed a new round of funding, and there was a celebration that night.

He knotted his tie in front of the mirror. "Sienna just got back. She might drink too much tonight. I need to keep an eye on her."

I leaned against the door frame and answered quietly. "Okay."

At the hospital, halfway through the scan, the doctor's hand suddenly went still.

"We've found the reason you've been feeling so dizzy and sick lately." She turned the screen toward me and spoke slowly. "The baby has a severe neural tube defect. The brain hasn't developed normally. This baby can't survive."

The tiny shape was still there on the screen.

Ten minutes earlier, I'd been wondering whether it looked more like a boy or a girl.

Ten minutes later, the doctor was telling me it would never have the chance to come into this world.

Before I could even take that in, a sharp pain tore through my lower stomach.

Blood quickly soaked through my skirt. The doctor's face changed, and she told a nurse to bring a wheelchair.

"You're already bleeding. We have to end the pregnancy as soon as possible, or your life is in danger too."

When they put the consent form in front of me, I didn't even have time to cry.

Before I signed, I asked only one thing. "Can I call the baby's father first?"

The phone rang for a long time before he picked up. All I could hear was the noise of the party.

"Done with the checkup?" Julian asked.

I gripped the phone, my voice shaking. "Julian, the doctor says the baby—"

"Nora, I don't have time to listen to you read me a report right now," he cut in. "If it's nothing urgent, just call a car and go home. Sienna's launch is about to start. Everyone's waiting for her."

The line went dead.

The nurse looked at me. "Your family can't make it?"

I stared at the dark screen for a long time before I shook my head.

Suddenly I thought maybe this baby had never wanted to come.

Maybe she didn't want to be born into a home with no love in it.

I closed my eyes and lay down on the operating table.

When I woke up, I was in the recovery room.

The nurse let out a breath of relief. "You hemorrhaged badly during the procedure. Thank God we caught it in time. You can't leave on your own. Someone has to come pick you up."

She handed me my phone. I stared at Julian's number for a long time. Then I called him again.

It rang for over ten seconds before he answered, even more impatient than before. "What now?"

I looked at the bag of blood still dripping beside my bed. I could barely hear my own voice. "The surgery's over. I hemorrhaged. We lost the baby. Can you please come?"

There was a moment of silence on the other end. Then he laughed, coldly.

"Nora, an hour ago you were reading me checkup results, and now it's a miscarriage and a hemorrhage? You'd tell a lie like that just to drag me away from Sienna's celebration? Don't you think that's pathetic?"

"I'm not lying to you."

The nurse couldn't stand it anymore. She took the phone. "Sir, Ms. Nora just had a termination procedure and lost a lot of blood during surgery. Someone needs to be with her."

Julian's voice went cold. "I don't know you. This is between my wife and me. Please don't help her put on a show."

In the background, I heard Sienna's voice. "Julian, come cut the cake! Everyone's waiting for you."

His voice softened instantly. "Coming."

Before he hung up, he added, "Nora, using the baby to compete for attention was bad enough. Lying about the baby's life is even worse. When did you turn into this?"

All that was left was the dial tone.

The nurse was white with anger. "That's the baby's father?"

I looked out the window as the sky darkened and slowly shook my head. "Not for much longer."

At midnight, I was still on the IV.

Suddenly my phone lit up with a video call in the group chat.

I thought Julian had finally remembered to ask about my day. But when I picked up, it was Sienna on the screen.

She'd probably had too much to drink and hit the button by accident.

The phone had been set down on the liquor cabinet, its camera pointed straight at the sofa.

Sienna looked up at Julian and suddenly smiled. "Julian, I regret it. All these years I've been to so many places. Snowy mountains, deserts, Antarctica. I thought that was the life I wanted. But seeing you and Nora, all of a sudden I want a home too. I don't want to keep drifting on my own."

Julian looked at her, and something came over his face I had never seen before. Pain.

It was a long time before he asked, hoarsely, "Why are you only telling me this now?"

Sienna's eyes reddened. "What if I hadn't left after graduation? What if I'd told you back then that I was willing to stay? Would you have married me?"

Julian didn't answer right away.

His silence said enough.

Sienna asked again. "Would you?"

"Yes."

That one word tore seven years between us to shreds.

I gasped for air. I could barely breathe.

When the nurse came to change my IV, she knocked the phone off the bed, and the call dropped.

I didn't call back. I just lay there quietly, watching the blood in the bag drip into my body, drop by drop.

When I got home from the hospital, Julian still wasn't back.

I packed my things into a suitcase and left the signed divorce papers on the dining table, with my lawyer's business card on top.

Then I bought a plane ticket to Norway to see the northern lights.