Chapter 72

Olivia

My heart pounded in my chest as I scanned the multitude of outfits hanging in my wardrobe. Settling on a lavender dress, I reminded myself that it was only Nathan, just Nathan, my lifelong friend.

But everything had changed last night.

The memory of our unexpected kiss intermingled with the sight of him in an intimate act of self-pleasure sent a flush across my cheeks.

We'd stumbled across a boundary we'd never crossed before, leaving me a disoriented mess.

I didn’t know why I was doing it, but I felt the need to look attractive around Nathan. It felt silly and pointless, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself. As I meticulously curled my hair, I fought the nerves threatening to consume me.

Looking into the mirror, I took a deep breath, my reflection showing a woman trying to piece herself together.

Walking down the stairs, I found Nathan waiting by the door. As I approached, his cheeks tinted themselves a shade of pink upon seeing me.

“I’m ready,” I mumbled, unable to meet his eyes.

“Alright,” he replied, his gaze focused on the floor. “Let’s go.”

A heavy silence followed, neither of us moving. “Is everything okay, Nathan?” I asked, attempting to ease the tension.

He looked up, finally meeting my eyes, and cleared his throat.

“Yeah, everything's fine, Olivia. It's just that…”

His voice faltered. I cocked my head. “What is it?”

Nathan’s face turned a deeper shade of pink. “You look nice, that’s all,” he confessed, his words hanging in the air. “You always look nice, but today…” He ran a hand through his hair. “Man, it’s gonna be annoying when other guys start asking for your number.”

His words made my heart flutter. At the same time, something about his concern filled me with a renewed sense of confidence, as though it was some sort of confirmation that maybe, just maybe, he did have feelings for me after all.

“Well, you could just put your arm around me then,” I blurted out, surprising even myself. My eyes went wide as I spoke, and I cleared my throat, fiddling nervously with a strand of my hair. “That… That should keep the other guys at bay, I guess.”

Nathan’s eyes widened, cheeks flushing a deep shade of red now. Without a word, he opened the door, his silence speaking volumes.

We climbed into the car and began to drive along the winding roads. It didn’t take long before I realized where he was taking me: we were going to the local diner, a place filled with countless childhood memories.

“The diner?” I asked, seeing its neon sign, on its tall post, begin to rise above the trees as we made our way down the road.

Nathan nodded. I glanced over at him, and for the first time that morning, I saw a hint of a smile on his lips.

“I thought it would be nice to revisit our old stomping grounds,” he said as he pulled into the parking lot. “Remember when we used to come here on Saturday mornings?”

The memory of it made me chuckle, but also filled me with a melancholy nostalgia at the same time. “Yeah,” I replied, smiling wistfully. “My dad…”

My voice fell away. I knew that I would be unable to finish the sentence before the tears started to flow, and so I stopped myself early. Nathan, seeing this, didn’t press for me to finish.

Entering the familiar setting, memories of my father taking us out for pancakes flooded back. It was a weekly Saturday morning ritual, and it was something that I always cherished.

This nostalgic sanctuary stood as a beacon of simpler times, before my dad and I were wrongfully evicted from the pack. Before these newfound unspoken feelings complicated my friendship with Nathan.

We found our old regular booth in the corner, and Nathan gestured for me to climb in. Smiling, I slid into the red leather seat and felt comforted by its plush embrace.

However, no matter how long we sat there, I couldn’t shake the tension between us. Our kiss still weighed heavily on me, and it was made even more unbearable by the visions of Nathan in his bed.

“Nathan,” I began, hoping to address the awkwardness. But as I met his gaze, words escaped me. At that moment, his leg brushed against mine. A brief, accidental contact, but he didn't pull away.

I cleared my throat, searching for the words. But none would come, especially now that the electric shockwave that was sent through me by his touch dulled my senses even further.

He glanced up at me over his menu for the briefest of moments, apprehension clouding his features. “Yeah?” he asked.

“I just…” I faltered, my courage deserting me. “Nevermind.”

Nathan looked at me for a moment longer before his blue-green eyes flickered back down to the menu.

We sat there, enveloped in silence. The hum of the diner seemed distant. The fleeting contact of our legs under the table provided a surprising comfort, anchoring me to the present.

“I’m looking forward to some chocolate chip pancakes,” I finally said, forcing a smile.

“Me too,” Nathan replied, smirking.

“With bacon?”

Nathan nodded. “With bacon.”

Our brief conversation seemed to ease some of the tension, and I felt my shoulders relax slightly as we waited for the waitress to come and take our order.

Through the discomfort of unvoiced emotions, I clung to hope.

Our friendship was strained, transformed even, but it was still there. Perhaps, just maybe, we could navigate these turbulent waters and find something more.

Nathan was, after all, still Nathan, my best friend, my anchor. This realization reassured me, offering a glimmer of hope in the uncertainty.

The waitress came and took our order. A few minutes later, two steaming cups of coffee were placed between us. I found comfort in the familiar aroma of the diner, and the conversation started to flow more easily between the two of us.

“Remember that one time when you got chocolate all over your shirt?” I asked, chuckling a bit at the old memory. “We were headed to a wedding. It was a disaster.”

Nathan’s eyes lit up, and a laugh escaped his lips. He leaned back on the tall booth and nodded, grinning, as though the memory dissolved all of his tension.

“Yeah,” he replied, wiping a tear caused by laughter out of his eye. “It was all over my nice white shirt. Your dad only had one of his old band tees in the back of his car. Remember how big it was on me?”

I had to laugh at the memory. I remembered seeing Nathan in an oversized Metallica t-shirt, one that my dad kept in the car for hiking. He had to tuck it into his pants and try to hide it beneath his suit jacket, but Colin quickly found out, of course.

“What did your dad say to you, again?” I asked. “I forgot.”

Nathan laughed even harder and shook his head. “He said… He said, ‘Nathan Ford, I’m going to make you wear a bib from now on.’”

Together, Nathan and I dissolved into laughter and even more banter. Finally, things felt at least somewhat normal.

Here, amidst the old and the new, I felt ready to face whatever came next.

After all, Nathan was just Nathan, and I was just Olivia, friends caught in an awkward dance between the past and an uncertain future.

It was unsettling, but somehow, it also felt right.

Or maybe that was just a false sense of security brought about by the fact that Nathan’s knee still lingered there, pressed up against my leg beneath the table.