Chapter 4

I didn't answer her. I was too busy thinking how stupid I'd been.

The news of Ethan's accident had overwhelmed me. I was already physically weak from the pregnancy, and I'd fainted.

When I woke up, his mother told me the body had been cremated. They hadn't even let me attend the funeral. They said I was pregnant and couldn't handle any more distress.

Every part of it should have told me that something about his death was wrong.

But we'd been everyone's idea of a perfect couple for six years. He'd always treated me so well. How could I have imagined he'd lie about dying just to get out of marrying me?

Then his older brother had appeared out of nowhere, supposedly returning from work in Africa with an African wife.

Seeing him had often left me disoriented. It had never occurred to me that Ethan might have staged his own death.

Only after I heard him with his mother did I grasp the size of the lie they'd told me.

Vivian saw that I wasn't reacting and smiled knowingly.

“A woman can always tell. Yesterday, when you were leaving for the hospital, I thought something seemed different. I was right. You already know.”

“You must be wondering why Ethan cheated. Why he'd fake his death just to stay with me.” She laughed. “Want to know what he says about you?”

“He says you're dull. You've been together so long that sex with you feels like something he has to get through. It's different with me. I always know how to make him feel good. He calls me his beautiful Black pearl. Says African women have something special…”

My heart started pounding. I was furious, and I couldn't keep it in any longer.

I slapped her across the face.

She covered her cheek and opened her mouth to curse at me. Before she could, Ethan shouted from the doorway.

“Claire! What are you doing?”

At the sound of his voice, Vivian's smug look vanished. Suddenly she looked hurt.

“Claire, I just came to comfort you. You've been so down lately. Why would you hit me? I know you're upset about Ethan, but you can't lash out at everyone else…”

Ethan stared at her cheek, then turned to shout at me.

“She's your sister-in-law!”

Instead of defending myself, I looked directly into his eyes.

“Tell me something. Is she really my sister-in-law?”

He froze. My expression seemed to unsettle him.

Vivian seized his hand.

“Sweetheart, could you take me back to our room? I don't feel well.”

He looked as though he wanted to answer me. For several moments, he struggled to speak. Then he helped Vivian leave.

I stared down, not moving, until my brother's message came through.

“The plane has arrived.”

I took a deep breath and got out of bed. I'd already written my goodbye letter. I put it in the nightstand drawer.

I wanted Ethan to find it himself after he learned I was dead.

I wanted him to read how much I'd loved him. Enough, according to that letter, to die rather than live without him.

I wanted that guilt to stay with him day and night. I wanted being alive to hurt more than dying.

When I was done, I packed nothing. I took my passport and bank card and walked out of the room.

Ethan was coming out of Vivian's room, and we ran straight into each other.

He hesitated, then spoke gently.

“I'm sorry, Claire. I got carried away earlier. I didn't mean to yell. But you shouldn't have hit your sister-in-law…”

I lifted a hand to cut him off. I had no interest in hearing any more.

“I'm going out for a bit. You can stay here and keep your wife company, like a good brother-in-law.”

I stressed the words “wife” and “brother-in-law.”

He didn't seem to notice anything wrong with my tone. He actually looked relieved.

“That's a good idea. Some fresh air might help you feel better. Don't stay out too late. I'll have the housekeeper make your favorite food tonight.”

I nodded. As I passed him, I let my expression harden.

You wanted to pretend you were dead, Ethan.

Now you could live through it yourself.