Chapter 110

Panic flitters around within me, making me nervous. I don’t know how to answer that. I don’t want to lie to Kimberly, especially since it seems as if she already knows everything to start with. But I have to protect Miles no matter what. Implicating him is the worst thing I can do for both our careers.

“It’s pretty blurry…” I start to say.

Kimberly gives me a flat look. “It is.”

“That could be… anyone…” My lie is already falling apart.

“Are you telling me you don’t remember who held you like that?” Kimberly says. “Esther. Don’t bullshit me. It’s insulting.”

I close my mouth. I can’t lie. I can’t tell the truth. My only available option left is silence.

Leaning back in her chair, Kimberly exhales a lengthy breath. “When you’ve been in this business as long as I have, you start to develop a sense for these things. Though, admittedly, you are not a great liar. I’m surprised how you kept everything a secret for this long.”

Looking down at the photo again, my stomach begins to churn. There’s no way out of this for me. But if I can protect Miles…

“It’s someone else,” I say, making up a lie on the sly. “But he’s married. I know that makes me look back, but… You understand why I want to lie.”

Kimberly closes her eyes. “Let me tell you what I think,” she says. “That is Miles Hamilton with you in the photo. You two are having a physical relationship, and likely have been for some time. This is why you were able to get the interview. This is also why Amber hates you.”

Kimberly really has been paying attention.

“I understand that you want to lie to me to protect Representative Hamilton and yourself, but you have to understand. I’m not an idiot. I have two eyes and a working brain. So do a lot of people.”

“Please don’t publish it,” I say quickly, the words escaping me before I can even think to stop them. The truth is, she’s right. Despite what happened at the campaign rally, where I thought everyone overlooked me, it’s likely a few observant individuals did not.

People like Kimberly, who have been in the business for a long time. They are always observing, taking notes, and filing things away to re-evaluate later.

This evidence might not be damning on its own, but when thrown in the mix with Miles’s blown kiss and his exclusive interview with me, it’s possible someone will fit all the pieces together.

Maybe someone who already has suspicions.

Then it’s game over for Miles’s candidacy and my career.

Kimberly leans forward. “Then tell me the truth.”

“You are right,” I admit. “You’re right about everything. But please… I can’t let this tarnish him.”

“And what about you?” Kimberly asks.

“I’d like to keep my job,” I say. “I worked hard to get it.”

Kimberly hums. Looking down, she lifts the photo of Miles and me and slides it back into the folder.

I wait nervously as she fastens it and then lowers the envelope back down onto the desk. When she catches sight of my face, and what I’m sure is the obvious worry on it, she sighs.

“I’m on your side here, Esther. I’m not going to be the one to release this photo,” she says. Yet before I can feel too relieved, she adds, “But that doesn’t mean that this story is contained. How many other people received this photo? We need to stay ahead of this story.”

“How?” I ask.

Kimberly presses her lips hard together. Her eyes dart around; I can tell she’s thinking. Then she lifts the landline phone that sits on the corner of her desk beside her computer.

“Patch me through,” she says, when someone answers on the other line. Another ring, and someone answers. I can’t hear more than faint mumbling from where I sit. At least, not until Kimberly speaks again. “Esther and I have a situation. Do you have a minute?” A pause. “When? Now? Good.”

Hanging up the phone, Kimberly stands.

I stand too, unsure.

“With me, Esther,” she says and carrying the envelope, walks around my chair to the door.

I follow her out into the main office, then around the cubicle pit to Hugo’s door. Kimberly knocks once out of courtesy, it seems, because she doesn’t wait for an answer before going inside.

After we walk into Hugo’s office, Kimberly shuts the door behind us. Hugo sits behind his desk, calm as ever.

“What’s the situation?” Hugo asks.

Kimberly places the envelope on the desk in front of Hugo. I start forward to snatch it away but stop myself. Hugo is a good person. I know I can trust him.

Still, every muscle in my body tenses up, knowing my secret is about to be revealed to yet another person.

Hugo opens the metal fasteners on the envelope, then, reaching inside, grabs the edge of the photo and pulls it free.

As soon as he sees the photo, his face instantly hardens into an emotionless mask.

“Hugo,” I start, ready to defend myself somehow, though I wasn’t sure how.

Hugo lifts his hand, palm forward, stopping me.

“This is you, Esther, and Miles Hamilton,” Hugo says.

His immediate recognition does nothing for my nerves. So far, my hope of the photo being too blurry to discern Miles’s identity has been near totally debunked.

“Don’t deny it now,” Kimberly whispers to me.

“It is,” I say, though I wince with the words. Miles and I have been so careless. Hooking up in a public space like we did, this was bound to happen.

Every time I’m with Miles, I feel like I’m in some kind of perfect fantasy. I’m swept up in the allure of being wanting and desired by a younger man. After so many years of sleeping beside a frigid, hateful husband, I finally seemed free.

I realize now that this freedom was an illusion. I may have mostly escaped the prison of my marriage, but I would never be allowed to exist without consequence.

I’m a reporter. Miles is a candidate for president. Even without the other issues standing between us, this one should have been the wall to keep us apart.

It’s unethical. This is a scandal I should have seen coming.

Maybe I did. Maybe I purposefully talked myself out of seeing it, convincing myself I had been wrong. All because I wanted Miles. Nothing could stand in my way of wanting him.

And now, I face the inevitable consequences.

“I’m sorry,” I say aloud, but it feels more directed at myself than at Hugo.

Hugo says, “I’m disappointed, Esther. I gave you so many warnings. I told you he could bring you into the light and then abandon you there.”

“That’s not what is happening,” I say.

Hugo looks up at me, obvious doubt in his eyes. “Is he going to accept his part in this? Is he going to announce today that you two are in a committed relationship, and accept responsibility for the fallout.”

Taken aback, I frown slightly. No, Miles isn’t going to do that. Even in my wildest dreams, I can’t imagine him shielding me like that, to hell with the consequences.

And I’d never ask him to.

Hugo sees the answer in my face. Looking down at the photo again, his perfect mask slips.

“He is not a man you can trust,” Hugo says, with a slight tremble of anger in his voice.