Chapter 140

I woke up in Matt’s arms.

He lay curled against me, his leg wedged between mine. His arm was draped over my stomach, the other acting as a pillow beneath my head. I could feel his soft breaths on the back of my neck, and the steady rise and fall of his chest against my back.

Soft light filtered around the curtains, lighting up the motel room. It looked worse in the daylight, everything well-worn and over-used. I didn't mind where we were, though, as long as we were together. Last night, Matt barely spoke. He just got ready for bed and curled up against me. I didn’t talk either, just held his hand until we both fell asleep.

I snuggled closer to him, and he tightened his hold on me. I was worried about him, but I didn’t want to force him to talk until he was ready. What happened was terrible, and I knew he needed time to process everything. The most important thing was being with him. Even if it meant incurring Jack’s wrath.

Matt sat up suddenly, his breathing hitched. I turned over and looked up at him, my eyes wide. He met my gaze. “Are you okay?” I asked.

He let out a breath and nodded. “Fine,” he said. He glanced at the digital clock beside the bed. “We should get going. We’ve got a bit of a drive.”

I nodded and shoved the blankets aside.

He rolled away from me and stood up. He stretched his arms over his head, the muscles in his back shifting. A few angry claw marks still marred his skin, but the wounds had closed, leaving a few red lines in their place.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

He dropped his arms and walked over to the bathroom. “A cabin.”

“Oh.”

“It’s in a nice spot. On the lake.”

“Sounds great.”

He just nodded without looking at me, then disappeared into the bathroom. I took the opportunity to get dressed. I had on one of his t-shirts and a pair of shorts, and I packed his shirt with my things. It smelled like him–like coffee, and leaves, and the earth after rain.

I pulled on a pair of blue jeans and a white t-shirt. The dance team gave out hoodies last week, and I put mine on. It was black, with purple lettering on the back detailing the name of the troop. My last name was embroidered above my breast.

We had another show coming up soon, and I practiced with them a few times a week. I no longer needed the mask, but we still planned to use them for our performances. Dance practice had become part of my routine, but sometimes I still felt a bit of wonder that I was included in something. That I could do the thing I loved, and my teammates accepted me.

Matt reappeared. I took his place in the bathroom and rushed to get ready. When I re-emerged, Matt was dressed and waiting for me. He had on jeans, boots, and his leather jacket. The t-shirt he was wearing was just tight enough that I could make out the broad expanse of his chest.

“Ready?” he asked, not looking at me.

“Yes.”

I pulled on my sneakers and threw my bag over my shoulder. Matt held the door for me, then led me to the car. I waited in the passenger's seat while he returned the keys to the front desk.

“There’s a diner nearby if you’re hungry,” he said after he got back in the car.

“Sure.”

He nodded and backed carefully onto the desolate highway. Tall pines and trees bordered it. Mist hung in the air, drifting across the grass on either side of the road. Matt drove with his hands clenched on the wheel. A few cars passed, but it was mostly quiet. It was still early, and we were surrounded mostly by forest.

It took about twenty minutes to reach the diner. Matt took a few turns, then pulled into a gravel parking lot. The diner was a squat stone building, with a small open sign glowing in the window. A red pickup and a few smaller cars were parked out front. In the corner, a station wagon sat halfway between two spots.

“Good parking job,” Matt muttered, pulling into an open space nearby.

I couldn’t help but smile.

He got out of the car, and I followed suit. I walked over to him, and he took my hand. “Come on,” he said. “We don’t want to waste too much time.”

“Okay,” I murmured.

He took me inside. A gray-haired lady looked up from behind the long counter, a soft smile on her face. “Sit wherever you want,” she said. A man in a flannel shirt sat in front of her, a plate of bacon and eggs in front of him. He eyed us as we walked by but didn’t say anything.

Two of the other booths were taken, but most of the seats were empty. Matt picked a place in the far corner, sinking into the seat that faced the room. I slid into the blue booth across from him. Before I could say anything, the waitress appeared at my shoulder and placed menus down in front of us. A tag above her breast pocket said her name was Dorothy.

“Any coffee or tea?” she asked.

“Coffee, please,” Matt said.

“Me too.”

She nodded and walked away, a slight spring to her step. A retro song was playing on the radio. That, mixed with the soft clatter of forks, sent a feeling of calm through me. I relaxed into the booth and gazed at Matt.

He gave me a tight smile, then surveyed the room.

“I like it here,” I said.

“I’m glad.”

Dorothy returned with our coffee. Matt ordered scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. After some contemplation, I decided to get pancakes. I couldn’t remember the last time I had them.

“Pancakes were my favorite growing up,” I said to him when Dorothy had walked away. “I don’t think I’ve had them since I was a kid.”

His smile was more genuine this time.

I reached across the table, and he let me take his hand. “I’m sorry you’re going through this,” I said.

He just shook his head, his hand tight in my grip.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself.”

He looked away from me, his jaw tight. “I don’t know how to stop.”

I didn’t answer. I didn’t really know what to say.

Neither of us spoke until our food appeared, and then we ate in silence. Matt paid at the counter when we were done, then led me over to his car. He opened the door for me, and I got inside.

“How long until we get to the cabin?” I asked once we were back on the road.

“A couple of hours.”

I nodded, and Matt turned on the radio. We didn’t talk until we stopped at a grocery store a few hours later. Matt went inside to grab a few things while I waited in the car. I turned on my phone and winced when I saw the messages and missed calls come through. They were all from Jack.

I’m fine, I texted. Don’t worry.

Jack immediately began typing, but I shut off my phone before I could see his reply. Matt put the groceries in the back, then slid into his seat.

“We’re only twenty minutes away now,” he said.

“I can’t wait to see it.”

He leaned over and kissed me lightly. “You’ll love it.”