Chapter 84

Nan’s POV

He did exactly what I advised him not to do.

I had never felt more self-conscious in my life. I knew our relationship would not be met with welcome. But Lionel had just made acceptance so much harder by doing this.

I could just hear the rumors.

‘Look at that gold digger…she’s completely turned the alpha against his family…I wonder what assets she has to make even the cold Alpha Lionel pussy whipped…’

I had heard a lot of degrading things in my life. This was no different. But it still burned my cheeks in mortification.

The worst part was the pompous way he expected me to applaud him.

He came home radiating victory. He so proudly informed me of what he did. How he cowed his big brother so thoroughly.

I gave him a rude awakening.

“Lionel,” I grit out. “I told you this would be a bad idea.”

“I told you it would be fine.” Lionel waves away my concern. “I took care of it.”

“Pft.” I huff out. “Sure you did.”

He narrows his eyes at me. I am unphased. Too irritated to care about his displeasure.

“Why are you angry?” He asks in confusion. “I was protecting you.”

“Protecting me?” I hiss.

“Yes.” He says simply.

“The only thing you were protecting was your ego.” I snap. “Humiliating your brother had nothing to do with me.”

“Then what was it?” He growls.

“You tell me. I specifically asked you not to do it, Lionel!” I say angrily.

“But it worked! Joseph won’t be able to get revenge even if he wanted to! He’ll be too busy trying to fight his demotion to try!”

“How do you know that? You can’t really promise that you haven’t just made things worse.” I spit.

I see his frustration with me building through the tensing of his jaw. “I don’t understand why you are upset.”

“Because you don’t respect me!” I cry.

“What does that even mean? Of course I respect you!” He denies.

“I told you not to do this…and you did it anyway. You didn’t even give me a chance to speak before you decided to condemn me when it came to David. You didn’t even properly check to see if the necklace I pawned was my birthday gift.”

I had mostly forgiven Lionel for those reactions. But I had not forgotten. A tiny, bitter part of me had been holding on to those frustrations for too long now.

“I do respect you.” He says.

“So you respect me, but you don’t take my opinions seriously?” I ask flatly.

“Your opinion is one of the very few that I value most!” He disagrees.

“You have a funny way of showing it.” I counter.

“I have shown it.” He starts.

“How?”

“I had Cora arrested and banned after she attacked you-” He begins.

“I appreciate that. But I did not ask you to do that.”

“-I kept Joseph’s sleezy hands off of you after the first time you met.” He continues despite my interruption.

“Was my punch not enough to convince you I know how to look after myself?” I raise an eyebrow.

“-grounded my own mother so she could no longer extend her claws towards you. I also-”

I stayed silent this time.

“-so that Joseph would not dare to use you against me again. I know how his mind works…he will not attempt to after this major loss.”

I observe him patiently. Taking in the concerned pinch at the corner of his eyes. The startling lack of anger at my provocation.

‘He really doesn’t get it,’ I realize. ‘Just as I don’t truly understand his actions.’

It’s easier to regain my composure once I know this. That this is a genuine misunderstanding happening. Once I see that Lionel was not trying to ignore my advice.

I purse my lips. “How about we try and explain ourselves from our individual perspectives.”

He nods. “That sounds like a good plan.”

“Why don’t you go first?”

“Joseph has always been…insecure. He has always resented me for being a natural leader. Something he struggled with his entire life.”

Lionel pauses. I listen. Feeling utterly engrossed into this glimpse of Lionel’s life.

“His reactions have always set my wolf on edge. He does these little acts of rebellions that borderline disrespect for his alpha. It makes being around him uncomfortable for me.”

I tap my fingers on my knee thoughtfully. “Could you explain that more?”

He tilts his head in that way he does when he is curious. “About what?”

My frown. “What do you mean?”

“What about that makes you so confused? No alpha enjoys being challenged by lesser wolves.” He clarifies.

It’s like a light goes off in my head. I straighten up in my seat. “Lionel…would you say that most of your actions are led by your inner wolf?”

He shrugs. “I suppose. What prompted that question?”

I stare at him meaningfully. “Because I think I finally understand why we keep misunderstanding each other.”

The answer had been staring me in the face the entire time. I knew logically that being wolf-less would make me different in obvious ways. Lionel himself has even told me the ways he had noticed it.

It is crystal clear to me now. Lionel takes in my body language. The soft “oh” that falls from my mouth.

“I think it’s because you have a wolf and I don’t.” I conclude.

His eyebrows fall down heavily over his eyes at that revelation.

“I’m not sure I get your meaning.” He mummers.

“You said it yourself. I don’t react like wolves do. Things that make sense to you don’t quite register to me.”

It was a sign of trust that I could confide that much to Lionel. It felt strange to admit out loud my shortcomings. That I fell a bit short of understanding sometimes.

“Okay.” Lionel says slowly. “I suppose I can see that.”

“Maybe it’s because you and Joseph are wolves that I don’t understand this. Something about your instincts.” I theorize.

“Because from my perspective…it look like you just made things worse for me by ignoring me. To the wider world…I am the outsider. The woman who wrecked the relationship between two brothers.”

Lionel’s face becomes stern. “Joseph did that himself.”

“Yes,” I agree. “But your actions were harsh. You never came down this hard on him before I got here.”

He snorts. “Of course I did.”

I wag a finger at him. “But never publicly. Any scoldings were always private before I got here.”

“How do you know that?” He ask skeptically.

“People talk.” I say.

He frowns at that but lets it go. Knowing he can’t disagree with my statement. As aware as I am just how fast gossip spreads.

He puts his attention back on the original topic. “I think I get why you were upset now.” He sighs.

I smile fondly at him. “I’m wolf-less…I have no choice but to be perceptive to the reactions around me because my senses do not alert me to a change in someone’s scent.”

He winces. “That sounds horrible.”

I snicker. “I think I’ve managed pretty well. You have to admit there are some scents or things you’ve heard that you wishes you haven’t.”

“Ha!” The sound comes deep from his chest. “You have no idea.”

“Ah,” I coo. “Poor alpha. How awful it must be to have superior sense to others.”

He gives me a dirty look. I only smirk back at him. Teasing him being my favorite hobby.

But then I sober up. “I think we need to establish some boundaries. Something that can help us navigate our miscommunication issues.”

“Okay. Like what?”

The following discussion is long but productive. I don’t know if it will work. But I won’t give up trying.

“After all…” Lionel smiles softly. “Making my girlfriend happy is my top priority.”

The official label makes my chest glow hotly. “I guess making my boyfriend happy can be at the top 100 things of my to-do list.” I tease.

He rolls his eyes. “Glad to know where I stand.”

“You should be.” I jape.

He stares deeply into my eyes. I meet his gaze with the full weight of my happiness. Wondering if he can see my heart in them.

“I guess I’ll have to earn my way up.”

“Oh?” I ask with intrigue.

“I think you’ll like my surprise for you.”