Chapter 62

The days had begun to stretch endlessly. Sadly, I found myself alone more often than not. The pack was busy trying to fortify our home against the continued attacks. They were trying to find all wholes the vampires could exploit.

The tension that had gripped our pack in the wake of this last vampire attacks had begun to create cracks within our seemingly unbreakable mental foundations. Everyone was exhausted and on edge.

Pack members were fighting, families were taking time away from one another. Things were not as they should be, but we were all trying to hold it together in spite of the growing separations.

The tension in my own home however was at a boiling point, and it seemed my volatile mood was at the heart of it. I was trapped in a cycle of self-loathing, aware that my poor attitude was pushing people away, yet unable to break free from the anger that fueled it.

The moments of solitude were a bitter reminder of the rift that had grown between me and the members of the pack I was close to, especially the triplets. Their attempts to understand my feelings had faltered under the weight of my own confusion and frustration. It was a painful truth that I had become the very thing I despised, someone who hurt the people I loved most.

One evening, as the full moon rose high in the sky, I found myself alone in our home, the darkness outside mirroring the turmoil within. I longed for the comfort of my mates presence, the warmth of their embrace, but my own pride held me back.

I heard the front door of our home open and close, and moments later Armand entered the living room, his steps cautious. He had become my lifeline in these difficult times, the one person who seemed to understand the storm of emotions that raged within me.

Armand was also one of the few people who still sought out my company lately as well. We were strangely each other’s confidantes now, which was a surprise to both of us, but a comfort and support we both needed.

He sat beside me, his eyes searching mine, his voice soft. "Beryl, we need to talk. Things are tense, I know. But here..." I nodded, unable to meet his gaze. "I know."

“My sons talk to me, they’ve confided in me. They’ve told me what’s going on with you. They’re confused and hurt. I understand you’re having trouble right now, but I don’t understand why you’re taking it out on them.”

I started to say something, but he held a hand up to stop me. “Just let me finish, dear. You need to hear this.”

His hand found mine, fingers interlocking in a reassuring grip. "I see the pain you're in, Beryl, and I know it's tearing you apart. But it's also tearing us apart. What can I do to help? What can we do?"

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I finally turned to look at him. "I don't want to be like this, Armand. I don't want to push everyone away, but I can't control it. There’s a darkness inside me, I can feel it. It’s taking over, and I don’t know how to stop it."

He brushed a stray tear from my cheek, his touch gentle. "We can figure this out together. You're not alone in this. You have me and the triplets. You have Dr. Matthias and Elara. You have the whole pack, and our allies. We are all here for you. We just need to know what you need from us."

My voice trembled as I spoke, the weight of my own emotions almost suffocating. "I'm upset that I feel this way, and I'm angry that no one seems to understand."

Armand's gaze held mine, his support unwavering. "I understand, Beryl. I see the struggle you're going through, and I want to help."

He reached out to place a fatherly arm around me. I missed my own mother and father and was so grateful for Armand’s presence in my life now it was overwhelming. There were so many overwhelming emotions inside me right now.

I leaned into him, seeking solace in his hug. "I don't know how to make it right." He wrapped both of his arms around me, squeezing, holding me close. His chin rested reassuringly on top of my head. "We'll find a way. You're stronger than you think."

As we sat there, our closeness a balm for my wounded soul, a heavy silence descended. I hadn’t realized I hadn't had a hug from anyone in weeks until now. Armand hesitated, his words carefully chosen.

"There's something I need to confide in you, Beryl." I pulled away slightly, looking up at him, my curiosity piqued. "What is it, Armand?"

He took a deep breath, his voice filled with uncertainty. "I've been spending more time with Seraphina, the leader of the ally pack. We've been working closely together to gather information about the vampires."

I lit up at this news. I had been so worried about him for so long now, thinking he would never let anyone in again. I had had hope for him but was unsure if he would be able to trust again. “Yeah?” I asked, not wanting to push him.

He met my gaze, his eyes searching for approval. "I've found myself drawn to her, Beryl, in ways I never expected. It's... complicated."

I felt a deep sense of empathy for Armand's struggle. "Love is complicated, Armand. You can't control who you're drawn to."

He nodded, relief washing over his features. "You’re right. It's just... I didn't expect this to happen, especially after everything with Amy."

I reached out and squeezed his hand, offering my support. "Life is unpredictable, and we can't always choose who we fall for. What matters is how we handle it."

He smiled at me, and I knew that he wasn’t really asking me if it was ok that he had feelings for Seraphina, but that he was reassuring himself that it wasn’t wrong.

As we sat there, our hearts heavy with the weight of our own emotions, I realized that despite the challenges we faced, the bonds within the pack remained unbreakable. The road ahead was uncertain, and the fractures within the pack were far from healed, but in that moment, I found solace in the knowledge that we were not alone in our struggles. Together, we would face whatever challenges lay ahead, one step at a time.