Chapter 191

YENA

I realized as I watched the change that washed over Nolan in the next few seconds, that I had never seen my husband truly sad before. Never. This was the first time.

Well, I reasoned, if he had felt sad when we’d been together sometime before, then he had kept it hidden away successfully. Right now, though, he was showing me everything. His energy suddenly felt tired, very tired, and he closed his eyes.

He took a few long, slow breaths in and out. I felt the air in the room stirring as he did so. It created a kind of cool breeze that slipped all around the edges of the floor and ceiling of the hotel room before circling back to us in the bed, chilling my skin and sending a shiver down my spine.

I climbed on top of Nolan. I guess if for no other reason than to get him to stop doing that. He was making it cold.

“Hey. It’s going to be okay,” I said. Immediately I second guessed my choice of words. They’d just come out… I didn’t know what exactly was right to say in this situation.

Nolan covered his eyes with one of his big hands. The other started stroking the length of my body.

I gave him a soft kiss on the lips. He took a couple big, fast and desperate inhales right as our lips separated, while my face was still close to his. I heard the sniffing sound of him smelling me and then felt the very air inside my lungs shooting up my throat and out of my mouth and into his. I rode his chest up and out as he breathed it in.

It was a strange experience, to put it mildly. I gasped until I caught my breath again.

When Nolan finally exhaled, his stiff muscles began to relax down into the bed. He pulled the hand away from his eyes. The arm flopped down to his side like deadweight.

I found some better words to try out.

“I’m glad we got to see him one last time,” I said. “And he seemed happy. Happier than a man that sick really should be. He loved you so much. He felt so lucky to have you in his life, you know.”

I guess that was the right thing after all, or as close as you could get. Because Nolan met my eyes and nodded a little, and I felt like he was saying some kind of thanks. Probably more for what my body was doing than my words. I got the feeling I was serving as a kind of security blanket as I lay there atop him, trying to calm him down.

“He was very old,” Nolan said quietly. “And so sick for so long.”

“Did they say… if he passed peacefully? In his sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Well. That is something.”

“Yes…”

I kissed Nolan on the cheek. And then the other one. And then the forehead.

His next exhale was loud. His chest fell so dramatically as he emptied out his big lungs, I almost slid right off him with the sudden movement.

He felt me slipping and reacted by gripping onto me tightly with both hands. His breathing seemed to grow more and more even and regular, more and more calm as he then started moving those large hands all over my body.

I went with it. Whatever he needed to help him feel better.

Heavy petting shortly turned into Nolan gripping my hips and grinding them hard against his pelvis. When, after more of this than I felt like I could tolerate, the impressive length of him was fully erect and I was dripping wet, he finally moved me into a slightly different position – he was always able to just lift me up and manhandle my body like I was a ragdoll, like I weighed nothing at all – and then snapped our bodies together fast.

I shivered all over and bit my lip against a scream that wanted to slip out. Once I caught my breath, I whispered into Nolan’s ear, telling him I loved him.

Just in time, because right after that, he went into a kind of frantic, animal state. He gripped the back of my head, with a good bunch of my hair in his fist, and pressed my face very hard against his chest. Every muscle in his body activated underneath me. His hips soared up and down in time with his hands sending my body crashing down against them.

I held on for dear life with my arms wrapped as far around Nolan’s middle as they could reach, and my nails dug into the hard flesh of his back.

I had been trying to be quiet.

Yes, we had privacy in our hotel suite. But there were lots of other people in this building who would have heard me moaning and crying if I’d let myself make all the sounds that the wolf inside me had been trained, by now, to keep a muzzle on sometimes.

Nolan had no such restraint right now. He was groaning and growling loudly the whole time. And honestly fucking me so hard I was getting dizzy. I could feel the vibrations of those throaty growls buzzing in his big, percussive chest.

It was an extremely rough but very quick ride. After only a couple minutes Nolan suddenly said, fast and firm and commanding, “Come with me,” like I was about to miss a train.

Lucky for him, my wolf really liked it when Nolan gave that command, and always obeyed.

She made me scream, too. As soon as I came, my head felt fuzzy with a daze of that disembodied, slipping feeling I got when Lily was trying to take me over. She did it just a tiny bit, just enough to take control of my voice and use it.

She told me later she did it because she knew that Nolan’s wolf wanted it.

He liked showing us off, Lily said. It wasn’t on accident that he sometimes got a little too public with acts of passion. The attention gave him a special little thrill.

Nolan was quiet for a long time while we got dressed and packed.

We didn’t need to rush this process, since we had almost two hours before we needed to leave for the train station, but we were both for sure awake after that wakeup call and everything that transpired after it. I wanted to get him out of the room and doing something, so we went downstairs to the hotel restaurant for breakfast.

We were sipping coffee after placing orders with a server, and I thought perhaps Nolan wanted some quiet time, as he seemed very pensive and reserved, but then suddenly he asked me, “What did he say to you?”

“Huh?” I blinked, startled.

“Alaster. When we went to visit him, he whispered something to you before we left. What did he say?”

I smiled nervously. “Hm. Well… can I ask you one thing first, before I tell you?”

Nolan arched an eyebrow. “Sure.”

“Did Alaster have any… special talents? Or abilities?”

Nolan narrowed his eyes. “Like what?”

I had a weird feeling that I didn’t need to answer this question. I felt like he knew exactly what I was asking. But he didn’t want to say it first.

“Like, prophetic abilities, I guess? Maybe he knew about things before they happened?”

Nolan shifted in his seat, propping his elbows on the table. He pressed his mouth against his hands briefly, then nodded and said, “I wondered a few times. He did say things, and then they happened. Could have been luck, I figured. I don’t really know. Why?”

I was still wretchedly nervous about all of this. I passed a cool hand over my throat, which felt warm. I was a little flushed.

“He told me that you and I… that our first child is going to be a boy.”

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