Chapter 66

Elara

The cold nipped at the edges of the window as I fastened the buttons of my coat, tugging it tighter around my waist. Outside, winter was finally beginning to set in for the year, blanketing the grounds in a layer of frost that shimmered faintly in the pale afternoon light.

I glanced at the clock by the door. I had just enough time to pick up the girls from school and take them out for the hot cocoa I had promised them.

The thought alone brought a small smile to my lips. It had been a long week—one too full of small, uncomfortable moments that left me feeling out of place in my own home. The wedding, the marriage certificate, Sarah’s return. But the girls always made things feel a little easier, and I was looking forward to spending a little time with them.

But I had just reached for my gloves on my way out the door when footsteps padded softly down the stairs.

“Elara.” Sarah’s voice carried that same disarming lilt she used whenever she wasn’t being watched by Alaric. I looked up just in time to see her at the base of the stairs, pulling on a fur-lined coat that looked far too expensive and pristine for someone who had supposedly spent years in captivity.

“I thought I’d come with you to pick up Zoe and Ella from school,” she said as she buttoned up her coat. “They’re my kids, too.”

Her kids. I hated how those words snagged on something inside of me and made my stomach feel sick all over again, even though I had already overcome this morning’s nausea. But she wasn’t wrong, technically, and maybe that was why it made me feel strange.

I forced a smile, nodding as I reached for my scarf by the door.

“Of course,” I said, hoping my voice didn’t betray the true feelings that were twisting tightly in my chest.

I couldn’t say no, even if I wanted to. If I said no, if I told her how I really felt about all of this—displaced, hurt, disrespected at times—then I was worried the guilt might set in.

This woman had spent years being kept away from her life. She barely got to get to know Ella before she was ripped away, and she didn’t even know about Zoe. She deserved some hot cocoa.

Still, no matter how much I tried to be understanding, it wasn’t easy. I felt as if I’d only just finally found peace in my life, only for it all to be shattered on my wedding day. In the span of mere minutes, everything had been upended. I wasn’t even technically married to Alaric anymore now that Sarah was back—she was.

But none of that was her fault. It wasn’t as if she had asked to have her death staged in a fire and held captive for years… right?

I repeated those words inwardly to myself as we stepped outside. I repeated them to myself until they stopped making sense and just sounded like mental noise, but even after that, I kept repeating them in the hopes that I would eventually begin to believe them.

The drive passed quietly, and by the time we reached the school, the girls were already waiting by the gate, bundled up in their coats and scarves. Ella’s face lit up the moment she saw me, her hand tugging Zoe along as they raced toward the car.

“Mommy!” Ella beamed, throwing her arms around me the second I stepped out.

Zoe hugged my waist tightly, and for a moment, their small forms pressed against me made me smile. But the way Sarah was watching silently from the side, her smile stiff and a little too measured, made us all go quiet.

“Hi,” Ella said shyly, shifting closer to me.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Sarah replied, dropping to a crouch and holding her arms out for them.

I didn’t miss the flicker of something uncomfortable that passed over Ella and Zoe’s faces as they shuffled forward and hugged Sarah, but I stayed quiet and let them have their moment.

After all, as Sarah had said, they were her children too.

What was wrong with me, then? Why did I find it so hard to see it that way?

…

By the time we returned to the estate later that evening, our bellies full of hot cocoa, dusk had settled over the grounds, and the house glowed softly beneath strings of lights. The girls ran ahead, their laughter echoing faintly as they hurried inside.

The sight that greeted us in the living room made me pause.

A large pine tree stood by the fireplace, its branches stretching nearly to the ceiling. Alaric stood beside it with a golden star in his hand and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows as he dusted stray pine needles from his shirt.

He turned as we entered, his eyes catching mine immediately. The smile that spread across his face—unapologetically bright, the kind of smile that had made me fall for him in the first place—was enough to make my heart stumble a little.

“Alaric, where did this enormous tree come from?” I blurted out as the girls gasped and chattered about the branches, chasing each other in circles around it.

Alaric rubbed the back of his neck with his hand almost sheepishly. “I cut it down,” he admitted, gesturing to the line of trees leading to the forest out behind the estate. “Thought it would be nice to have a real tree this year instead of a fake one.”

I pressed my fingers to my lips, stunned. It was a humongous tree, and all I could picture was Alaric dragging it through the snowy forest, his hair mussed and sweat lining his brow. I had to admit, the thought stirred more than just my heart.

But Sarah cut in with a giggle, “Oh, Alaric always used to cut down our Solstice tree every year. I guess he only used a fake tree while we were separated.”

That comment made me pause for more than one reason. Was she implying that he was so miserable, even with me, that he couldn’t bear to cut down a real tree—that her return was the only reason why he wanted a real one now?

And then there were those two words—were separated—that made my stomach twist even more.

Were separated.

As if she had come back and resumed her old position, and that they would no longer be separated.

Suddenly, either oblivious to the tension or trying to mitigate it, Alaric held up the shimmering gold star in his hand. “Who wants to put the star on top?” he asked, glancing between Ella and Zoe.

Ella’s head shot up. “Mommy should do it!”

Zoe nodded in agreement. “Yeah! Mommy!”

Sarah stepped forward, brushing her hair back as she smiled. But the girls pushed me forward instead.

“No, we meant this Mommy!” Ella said firmly, grabbing my hand.

A sudden silence filled the room, thick enough to cut with a knife. Sarah’s smile didn’t falter, but there was something too tight in the way she held it. Alaric glanced at me, conflict flashing across his face.

I swallowed, gently prying Ella’s fingers from mine.

“No, I think Sarah should do it,” I said softly, forcing the words out as smoothly as I could. “She’s missed enough of this.”

I didn’t miss the way Alaric’s eyes lingered on me, something unreadable flickering behind them. But when Sarah beamed, his shoulders eased, and he lifted her onto his shoulders without hesitation.

The star caught the light as she placed it on top, her fingers curling into the dark green branches.

I smiled as I watched them. I smiled until it hurt.

But all the while, I bit down gently on the inside of my cheek to keep the tears from coming. And when my hand began to drift toward my belly, I quickly excused myself before I burst out crying.