Chapter 153

Almara’s Pov

I stomp my way through the jungle, pushing foliage out of my way and cursing through my blurred vision. I know I’m not being the most effective searcher right now, but I can’t seem to get my emotions under control. So, I stop trying to.

I sink down onto the sand and let the softness hold me. Bringing my knees up to my chest, I burrow my head into my hands letting my hair fall down and weep. I cry uncontrollably and just allow myself to feel every anxiety, every worry, and every concern.

I thought when Arthur was dying that might have been the worse pain, but somehow this is worse. It’s a fear and mourning that sizes every cell in the body. I cry so much that I think I’m beginning to grieve things that aren’t even related to Graces disappearance.

Every stress from the past few months that has piled up is finally breaking through. When Arthur and I first started to really fall for one another I told myself that was impossible because of how good it could be, I never once expected it to come with so much drama.

Even now I cry at that realization. I refrain from scolding myself and telling myself that Arthur is the best thing that’s ever happened to me because even if that’s true, there still has been a lot that has been awful that’s happened.

That’s not even necessarily Arthur’s fault, and the fact that he’s suffering too makes me cry even harder. I cry for Bess who deserved a more dignified death. I cry for my parents who only want what’s best for me. I cry until the tears stop coming.

Once empty of tears, I lift my head. Somehow, even with Grace still not found, I feel better- if only slightly. I take a deep breath in and taste the salty air. On the exhale, a warm breeze brushes my hair aside. I take the strands still sticking to my soaked cheeks and tuck them behind my ear.

Now I need to focus. The crying might have made me physically feel better, but the reality is still the same. Grace is still out here somewhere and she needs me. This understanding settles with a new sense of confidence within me.

Sitting here crying won’t bring my Grace back, she needs a mother who is strong right now. Then, as if something primal in me clicks, I get to my feet and take a long whiff in. I should be able to pick up on Graces scent as well as follow my motherly instincts to get to my child.

Now laser focused, I look through the jungle with intense scrutiny. I look behind every tree, over every rock and log, I part bushes and scan the surrounding area for unidentified tracings.

I keep looking until the sun has significantly shifted positions in the sky. Eventually, I come back to my own track marks. Only then do I remember that Arthur and I agreed to come back to one another after twenty minutes.

I curse under my breath and head back to our spot, feeling guilty for probably putting him through more worry.

I reach the front of the beach and see him. Ther first thing I notice is that Grace isn’t with him. The second thing I notice is Arthur is talking to one of the ship directors. I pick up my pace to hopefully hear some of their conversation.

When I reach them, Arthur turns to me and pulls me in for a hug. “There you are.” He says which proves I did give him needless worry.

“I’m sorry, I lost track of time looking for her.” I tell him.

Arthur immediately pulls back and looks at me. “Have you been crying?” Sometimes I hate how well he can read me. I cast an embarrassed look at the crew member and Arthur quickly dismisses his question. “This is the Harold. He says that the boat has to leave tomorrow.”

Panic and defiance both take a hold of me. I plant my feet into the ground and flat out refuse. “No. We can’t go.” Arthur puts his hands on my shoulders to keep me steady.

“We aren’t leaving. Don’t worry.” Arthur says and just as he finishes his sentence, some fight in me does settle. I pull my shoulders away from my ears and force myself to remain level-headed, for Graces sake.

“We have other customers who have booked dour services. We cannot cancel on them.” The crew member, whose name tag and Arthur introduce him as Harold, says. I hate that my initial reaction is to ask him why not.

Clearly, I know that Arthur and I aren’t the only ones who utilize this boat service, but aren’t we the most important?

Sounds like something Sofia would say. Lily says with a warning tone and I hate to admit she’s right. I remind her in any other circumstance the thought would never have crossed my mind, but isn’t one of the perks of being in the Hurricane Pack special treatment, especially in cases of emergency?

As though reading my thoughts, Arthur asks Harold to let us talk alone. Harold looks more then happy to be relieved from this awkward conversation and hurries away. Arthur turns fully towards me and takes my hand in his, bringing them up to his lips.

“I know this isn’t how we expected things to go,” Arthur says and I laugh at the irony because when have things ever gone as we expected them to go? Arthur gives me a funny look and I know it’s because I’m acting out of my normal way but dammit maybe it’s about time.

“How can you be so clam about this?” I say, softening.

“Because our daughter is the offspring of you and I. That means she’s a survivor and a fighter. Besides, you say how advanced she was getting out here, I think she really is okay. I can feel it.” Arthur says and I can tell he means it.

I try to let myself tap into our mother-daughter connection and feel in my bones if she’s okay or not, but honestly I can’t feel past the worry. She’s still so young and we’re in a place none of us have been to before, I hardly think I’m over reacting.

“What about the ship?” I ask. “How are we going to get home when we do find her?”

Arthur lets a smile pass between his lips. “See? When we find her. The island isn’t big and we’ve covered only part of it, we’re going to get her.” Arthur nods to make sure I’m still with him and I nod. He’s right. We have to be optimistic and the reality is she is somewhere on this island.

“As for the ship, that’s all arranged. Another ship is being sent for us so once we do find Grace, it’ll be like a re-do on this vacation that started off so great.” Arthur says, and I can’t help but admit that does sound nice.

The sun shifts positions and sends a beam directly down on us, warming our skin and setting Arthur’s eyes aglow. I let my guard down and decide to fully believe Arthur and let his positivity engulf me.

Only now that I’ve calmed down can I see how entitled I was being and feel ashamed for letting myself get like that. I open my mouth to apologize to Arthur, but before words can come out he leans down and kisses me.

“It’s okay.” He says and instantly I know that he knows me better than I give him credit for. Gratitude for him fills me. I don’t think I could ever do life without him. “Let’s go find our badass baby girl.” He says and begins to lead the way.