Chapter 128

A cheer goes round the train car and we all lift our glasses higher, toasting our friend and making her feel at home, before we each take a sip. Daphne, a little embarrassed but clearly pleased, struggles to take a sip because she’s smiling so hard. A little rush of joy moves through me as the rich taste of the champagne moves across my tongue, the bubbles echoing the effervescent happiness of my soul in this moment.

“Well, thank you,” Daphne says, nodding her head around to all of us. “But the true celebration is your success at the Academy this first semester –“

We all cheer round at this too, laughing and shouting, I think needing this outlet after the stress of it all.

“To making it through!” Daphne says, raising her glass again, and we all toast to this as well, sipping more. When it’s all done, I frown at mine and Daphne’s half-filled glasses and move around her to grab the second bottle of champagne out of Jesse’s hands the moment he pops it open.

“Hey!” he shouts in protest, but I know that he doesn’t really care as I take the bottle by the neck and move back to Daphne’s side.

“Sorry, this is girl champagne,” I say, giving a little shrug and carefully looping my arm with Daphne’s, grinning at her and nodding towards the door to the bathroom at the far end of the room. I turn my smile on her alone now. “Want to take a second, just me and you?”

“Well, if there’s girl champagne involved,” she says, giving a happy little shrug. “Who am I to protest?”

“I know there’s some boy champagne back here,” Jesse murmurs jokingly, ducking beneath the bar and pretending to search.

“Boy champagne is just whiskey,” Rafe mutters, dry, as Daphne and I move along to the bathroom and I push open the door. “Is there any of that back there?”

“Yes!” Jesse shouts, victorious, popping back up with a tiny bottle that our dad either forgot to have removed or secretly hid there, knowing Rafe would want it. It’s his drink, after all. “Boy champagne, all around!”

And, as the boys start to pull out cut crystal glasses to drink their own toast, I shut the door behind Daphne and I and prepare myself for a much-needed bit of girl time.

When I turn around, prepping to pour both of us more champagne, I smile to see Daphne looking around a bit in awe.

“Um,” she murmurs, taking in the wide pink cushion that stretches along the length of the window, the crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling, the marble finishes to the sink and the tucked-away toilet area. “This was…not what I was expecting when I thought ‘train bathroom.’”

“I know,” I say, laughing and gesturing over to the window seat. “This was…all mom. But she knows that a bathroom is for more than bodily function.”

It’s true, though. As Daphne and I settle ourselves onto the pink cushion and I refill our flutes, I consider that while mom and dad designed this caboose together – as they do most things – she really took the reins in here. The main room of the train car has much more dad in it – dark colors, masculine lines, polished wood - all rich monied elegance. But here, with rose-gold details and lilies and soft bright lighting?

Yup. Dad probably didn’t even think about the bathroom, and mom snuck this in. Which is probably why it’s my favorite space.

“Ari,” Daphne sighs, and I open my mouth to stop her saying that she’s sorry – but she puts out a hand towards me. “Will you please let me get this apology out? It’s important to me.”

“But I’ve already forgiven you,” I say, smiling softly as I rest my head against the wall. “If there’s anything to forgive.”

“I know, and I’m grateful for that,” she says, nodding, “but…I mean, it’s unforgiveable, isn’t it? I feel like you may never trust me again. You should be able to trust me implicitly – know that I’d never, ever slip something into your drink or betray you in any way. Because, I mean, if I can be bought so easily…well, why would you trust me in the future?”

“What do you mean, bought?” I ask, frowning.

“They were having trouble figuring out how to knock you all out before the trial,” she says with a worried frown. “Most of the cadets were eating alone or in two’s, so they just slipped it into the food, but you guys, with your party…. They came to me last minute and told me the plan. I refused at first, but they said if I didn’t do it then they’d fire me.”

“Daph,” I say, shaking my head. “That was unfair of them, not you – you were just doing your job. And it was absolute crap for them to make you do something you were uncomfortable with and threaten your job if you didn’t.”

“I know,” she replies with a frown. “But still…I don’t want anything to be damaged between us.”

“And I promise you, it’s not!” I say, reaching out and putting a hand on her knee, willing her to believe me. I watch as her eyes flick to the door too. “And they’re not mad either. Honestly, Daphne, we’re good! If anything, I’m going to have a talk with my dad about how they threatened you at work. That’s not right.”

Daphne sighs and we talk through some further protests, but finally we get to the point where we both feel like we’re on even terms. The champagne helps, I think, unwinding our tongues and our inhibitions, and after long I think we’re feeling even again, renewed.

Which is how I know that it’s time to blow up our world again.

“What?” she asks, frowning at me, sensing that I’m prepping to tell her something as she holds out her glass for a refill. I oblige her, filling my own as well.

“I’ve been keeping secrets, Daph,” I say with a sigh. Her eyes go wide and I laugh little, shaking my head. “Nothing to do with you, but…”

And then, with another big sigh – honestly, I’m getting kind of tired of sighing – I spill. I tell her everything – about having two mates, and Luca and Jackson figuring it out last night, and how everything went to pieces, and how Jackson didn’t show up for the train today.

Daphne is an amazing listener, scooting immediately closer to me and wrapping an arm around my shoulders. She quietly listens to the whole story, nodding her understanding and hugging me tighter and tighter as I go. “Wow,” she murmurs when I’m all finished. “Ari – that’s…that’s insane.”

“I know,” I groan, shaking my head.

“I can’t believe Jackson didn’t come home for winter break,” she murmurs, looking over her shoulder out the back window of the caboose, almost as if she’ll see him running back up the tracks behind us or something. “What a jerk.”

I laugh a little, straightening up and shaking my head at her. “He’s not a jerk, Daphne, he doesn’t have it in him to be a jerk –“

“All men do,” she says with narrowed eyes, and I laugh, which just makes her laugh in turn.

“No, Jacks is…he’s just delicate in this way,” I say on a sigh. “I guess he just…needed a minute alone to figure out how he feels about all of this. But at least Luca’s here.”

“Yeah,” Daphne says, patting my shoulder warmly. “But I get it. You wanted both of them – you want both of them. It’s hard for everyone, I think.”

She takes a moment to consider me, tilting her head a little bit. “So,” she says quietly, “they want you to choose between them?”

Slowly I nod, sipping my champagne.

“And are you…leaning one way or another yet?” Her question is hesitant, careful.

My eyes go wide and my mouth pops open. “No!” I say, shaking my head vehemently.

“Really?” she says, leaning forward, pressing but doing so delicately. “Like, not even at all? Not even a little bit of you liking one more than the other, or seeing a…a better life match? Or…” she wrinkles her nose a little bit here before lifting her champagne to her lips, “who might be…better in bed?”

I burst out laughing at this and cover my face for a second with my hands. “No, Daphne,” I say with a sigh, dropping my hand and smiling at her. “I mean, honestly, they’re both really different and bring different thing to the table – but maybe it’s because I’m mated to both of them? But I’m absolutely not leaning towards one or the other right now. They’re both…mine.”

I sigh, hoping it makes sense, even though I know it’s probably impossible unless you’re in my own heart.

“Well, then that just makes it all harder, doesn’t it?” Daphne says, twisting her lips a little as she stares at me with empathy.

I nod, leaning my head against the wall, grateful that she understands.

Daphne’s eyes move over me now, taking in how sad and exhausted I am by all of this. I mean – it’s been a big couple of days. I think it makes sense that I’m tired and stressed by it all, even if we are celebrating today.

“You know what might make you feel better?” she says, soft and encouraging. I lift my head, curious. She grins, leaning closer. “Turning you back into a girl.”

I sit up straight, laughing “What!?”

“Come on!” she says, her smile deepening. “Don’t you want to go back to the Capital as a girl!? You can borrow some of my clothes, and I have make up –“

“Yes!” I shout, immediately enthused. “Oh my god, yes!”

That’s enough for both of us. We jump off of the window seat and hurry for the door. The boys all turn to us in surprise as we burst through it, but we ignore them. Daphne heads immediately for her suitcase as I dash behind the bar, getting a bottle of wine instead of champagne so that we’re thoroughly fortified for our mission.

“Important Princess business!” Daphne says loftily as she strides back towards the bathroom, her case swinging in her hand.