Chapter 381

I slowly exhale as I concentrate on the little stack of wood at the center of the empty space between the tents that my mother lead us to. A little anxious, I glance around at all of the very flammable canvas fabric around us.

“Steady,” Jacks murmurs, smirking down at me from his place at my side, sensing the direction of my thoughts. “You control it. You won’t set the camp ablaze unless you want to.”

I huff a laugh and shake my head, hoping that he’s right. Then I glance to my other side, where mom, Cora, and Rafe are waiting, watching me carefully, impatient though they’re trying to hide it. Jackson takes my hand and I feel the power start to flow between us. Just a trickle right now, but more at the ready whenever I want to pull on it.

“I mean, we’re not going to have the darkness,” I say, my voice small, my eyes moving to Cora’s. She swallows hard as she nods to me, raising her chin. My mom steps closer to her sister, taking her hand. “Or…the wind.”

“Flame is still great, Ari,” Rafe murmurs, his green eyes wide and full of support. “It’s kind of the important part. Let’s just…see what you can do.”

“Okay,” I whisper, squeezing Jackson’s hand. And then I exhale again and turn back towards the stack of wood, concentrating on it.

Instantly, it bursts into flames, bringing a little smile to my mouth. Because despite all of the horrible things that have happened, I do love the magic. It’s warm and peaceful and right. I pull on Jackson’s power then, letting the fire roar happily as it grows in size, far bigger than it should be with such a little pile of wood to feed it.

I take a minute to let the joy and the magic fill me, taking a deep and peaceful breath. And then I begin to experiment, making the flame go bigger and smaller, seeing what I can do.

“It’s still very effective,” Rafe murmurs, glancing at our mom. “Even without the wind. The fact that she can just look at something and make it burst into flames – I mean, as long as her visuals aren’t interrupted…”

Rafe and mom continue, discussing military applications, but I sigh and little and turn back to my happy little fire. Or, happy gigantic inferno, more accurately.

But even if Rafe is right that my magic is still a very destructive force, I miss the wind. Being able to turn it into that wide and flaming gyre…

Man, but that had been cool. And it had felt good and right, singing through my body. After all, that’s how I had been able to move it around.

A little wind ripples through the little square clearing now as I remember what it had been like when the fire danced along with me, moving as I moved. The wind moves towards the fire, which seems to reach for it, eager for the fresh oxygen that it brings. I smile when the wind plays with the tendrils of fire, letting them grow a little, pulling it towards the sky.

Then I smile, turning my head to Cora. “Is that you?” I ask, curious, nodding towards it. “Bringing in the wind?”

But she just stares at me and slowly shakes her head. “I’m not doing anything, Ariel.”

I frown, glancing back towards the fire as the wind dies down. “You didn’t?” I whisper. Because, I mean…we’re entirely surrounded by tents and it’s a calm day. If Cora didn’t do it…

My mom gasps and I turn to see her grasping Cora’s hand, looking at me with wide eyes.

“What?” I ask, feeling wary, taking a step closer to Jackson, who is ready for me – as he always is. Jackson steps behind me, keeping hold of my hand with his, letting me lean against his broad chest.

“Sweetheart,” mom whispers, glancing back at the fire. “Baby…try it again, okay? Can you…can you pull on the wind? Like you did before when…Luca was here too?”

I frown at her and shake my head. “Mom, it needs physical contact,” I say. “That’s how it’s always been. And he’s…not here.”

She looks at me, her expression pleading, and she glances once at Jackson like she’s worried for him. “But he is with you, baby,” mom whispers, raising her own hand to wrap around her neck, high up and close to her jaw.

I gasp a little, realizing that she’s touching her neck precisely where Luca marked mine. My own hand flies up to the mark – the indelible piece of Luca that I’ll always carry –

And then I snap my head back to the fire that still burns in the middle of the clearing, and I pull hard on the wind, just as I would if Luca were here holding my hand.

The wind soars through the clearing, ragged and uneven. I pulls it in shaky bursts, not the smooth torrent it was before – but it’s there – and it’s so clearly responding to my call –

I moan a little, in relief as much as grief, as the wind mixes with the fire, lifting it high into the air. We all watch, breathless, as the fire climbs into the sky. And I shake my head because it’s not the same. The whirlwind sputters and starts, climbing and then falling and then climbing again, rough and uneven.

But it’s there.

I let it fall, letting the fire collapse to the ground, and groan as I turn into Jackson, burying my face in his chest, my shoulders shaking as I try to put the pieces of this together. He wraps one arm around my back, his other hand softly cupping the back of my head as he stands steady and holds me tight. I take a few deep breaths, trying – trying hard to understand it – to put the pieces of it together.

And as I do, the Goddess’s words come back to me. That I need my mate’s marks, that it’s important to my magic. That this, maybe, was what she was talking about the whole time. That getting the marks wasn’t even about my romantic relationships – that it was always about the magic. About giving me a piece of them as part of me so that I’d be able to do…this.

Whatever this is.

Even when they’re far away.

“Baby,” mom murmurs after a long moment, coming close. “Sugar, are you all right?”

I take a few deep breaths, trying hard to pull myself together, and then I turn my face to my mother, my cheeks damp. “How is it possible?” I breathe.

“Ariel,” mom says, stepping close and again glancing up at Jackson with that worried expression. “Luca…your bond with him isn’t fully broken, all right?”

My eyes go wide as mom quickly explains, Rafe and Cora coming to stand close behind her listening. She tells me everything – about dad saying the physical effects of the rejection should have been so much worse, and checking on the bonds, and finding that my bond with Luca is still…there. Ragged and thin but there.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I whisper, shaking my head, wrapping my arms as far around Jackson as they’ll go, wanting to keep him close.

“You were already in so much pain, baby,” mom whispers, shaking her head at me. “We never meant to keep it from you forever. But we wanted to give you space, to let you heal piece by piece. I’m sorry if that was wrong.”

I nod, looking down at the ground, considering it. But ultimately deciding that…I get it. That she was just trying to protect me and let me heal.

Then I look up at Jacks, incredibly anxious about how he’s going to react to the news.

“It’s okay,” he says, quite soft, looking down at me like we’re the only two people standing in this clearing. He lifts his hand to my face, softly stroking my cheek with his thumb. “Doesn’t change anything for me. I’m still not letting that jackass anywhere near you – but if you still have part of a bond?” he shrugs. “At least we know some weird other mate isn’t going to come and mess up our lives. Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I say, giving him a tremulous smile, nodding.

“It’s fine, tiny,” he murmurs, dipping his head to press a kiss to my forehead. “It’s precisely fine. Don’t worry about me.”

I close my eyes for a moment, turning my head and pressing my cheek to his chest, again wondering how I got so lucky as to have this calm, patient man as my mate. He holds me tighter, letting me feel his support.

“Ariel,” Rafe says after a moment, quiet, making me open my eyes and focus on him. “How does it feel, the magic now? It looked…different.”

“Yeah,” I sigh, standing up straighter and pulling away from Jackson for a moment. “It…feels different than when Luca was standing right here with me. It’s…unsteady. Harder. Do you…” I bite my lip, looking towards my mom. “Do you think he can feel it, mom? I don’t…I don’t want to be taking the magic from Luca, not if he were unwilling to give it.”

“He gave you the mark willingly, baby,” mom says, stepping forward and cupping my neck with her palm, looking me sadly in the eyes. “I think he gave you the magic along with it, even if he didn’t mean to. I think it’s okay. I don’t think it’s a violation.”

I nod, exhaling a long breath, choosing to believe her even if I still have questions.

“So it’s…it’s harder to call now?” Rafe asks, anxious and getting us back to the problem at hand. “But not…too hard?” He exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair, glancing towards the tent where dad and Roger are working to plan the counter-assault. Explosions still echo in the air, though further away now. “It’s just – Ariel, it’s a big deal if you can still use Luca’s wind – or, your wind now, if that’s what it is -“

“Yeah, I can do it, I think,” I say, nodding a little. “Just, um…” I look at mom and Cora, anxious. “Can we stay out here for a little bit? Experiment, see what I can and can’t do?”

“Sure, trouble,” mom murmurs, patting my shoulder and glancing at Cora, who nods. “We can take a little time.”

“I’ll go update dad,” Rafe says, giving me a steady nod and then striding for the door.

I exhale and turn away from Jackson, reaching again for his hand.

“Let ‘er rip, tiny,” Jacks murmurs, pressing a kiss to my hair, ever-supportive and lovely as he always is. “Let’s see what you can do.”

With a last glance toward mom and Cora, my heart breaking for these two women whose children were kidnapped today and who are still finding the strength to help me, to help their nation, I turn back towards the fire. And, determined to do whatever I can to help, I exhale and begin to experiment with the fire and the wind, seeing how high and steadily I can raise it.