Chapter 136

“Actually,” the guard begins, glancing between the two of us. “King Caleb has already given Harper permission to enter his chambers as she desires.”

Annabelle’s entire face flashes bright red.

I very nearly smirk with satisfaction, but I bite it back at the last minute. It wouldn’t do to be smug right now. After all, I am not the one who is going to marry Caleb. I might win this battle, but Annabelle will still win the war for Caleb’s affections.

For now, however, I wait for her to step aside then enter the room with the guards’ permission.

As soon as I am within it, they close the door behind me, sealing me in the darkened room. Despite it only being midday, the light in the room is dim. The curtains have been drawn to cover the windows and all of the lights are off.

“Caleb?” I call out. It’s hard to explain how or why, but I can feel his presence in this room. I know he’s here somewhere, even if I can’t see or hear him.

If only my senses were as strong as his, I bet I’d be able to see him in an instant, just as I am certain he’s been clocking my every step since I walked into this room.

“Caleb, I know you are in here. Where are you?”

Still he doesn’t answer. Not for a very long moment.

Then, like a rumble in the dark, he says, “I nearly killed a man, and I have no idea if he deserved it.”

Following the sound of Caleb’s voice, I walk toward the edge of the room where I finally find Caleb slumped on a chair pulled against the wall. Shadows hide most of his face, but even in the dark, I see the occasional flash of red over his eyes.

“Can I touch you?” I ask him.

“Please,” he replies. Closing his eyes, he dips his head forward.

Slowly, as to not startle him, I raise my hand, bury my fingers in his hair, and begin to lightly massage his scalp. As I work, his body starts to dip, some of the tension releasing from within it.

Softly, he begins to speak once more. “You have a strange power over me, consort. Why is it that only you seem to be able to ease my wolf?”

“I don’t know,” I admit, my tone as gentle.

“Have you done this for other Alphas?” His words add bite, “For your Samuel?”

“No. I’ve never touched a man the way I’ve touched you.”

“Good.” Satisfaction rumbles through his voice.

It isn’t fair for him to say those things, to want me to be his alone, while I cannot expect the same devotion from him. Even now, I think about Annabelle waiting for Caleb on the other side of his door.

“Annabelle tried to see you,” I say.

“She does not need to see me like this.”

“She is your betrothed.”

“What does that matter?” he asks. Opening his eyes, he glances up at me. I still my ministrations, staring back.

My eyes are adjusting to the dark now, and I can more clearly see the planes of his face. The proud set of his jaw. The intensity of his eyes.

“She’s going to be your wife. Don’t you think she should be the one to help you like this?” I ask.

“She is incapable.”

“How can you tell if you don’t let her try?”

“I just know.”

“That doesn’t make sense. You have to let her try.”

In an instant, Caleb pushes himself up to his feet. My hands fall away from his scalp, but he catches me by the wrists, keeping them prisoner.

“Why do you care so much about her?” Caleb growls. “She is not a threat to your position here. I’ve told you, nothing will change between us.”

“It’s not my position I’m worried about,” I tell him. It’s my heart. “You know I don’t want to be the second woman in your life.”

“You aren’t second,” Caleb insists. “You are simply another.”

“That means second!” I snap.

He glares down at me. “You demand too much of your King. Have I not gifted you a life of luxury and privilege? Have I not saved you from the squalor of your previous life?”

“You’ve denied me my request,” I tell him. “So I will ask you again. Release me and let me be free.”

His hands tighten around my wrists. “Never.”

I wince in pain, and he immediately loosens his hold. His eyes soften too, losing some of their edge. I don’t think he meant to hurt me.

“It’s getting worse, isn’t it? The paranoia, and the pain. The headaches…” I say.

“Don’t ask questions you already know the answer to,” he says.

That means yes, it is. Which further means that even with my help, Caleb is struggling against the growing darkness in his mind.

“Was there some kind of trigger?” I ask. “If we can narrow down what sets you off, perhaps we can keep it from happening.”

Caleb fully releases his hold on my wrists now. I drop my hands to my sides.

“I thought one of the Alphas said something. A whisper. It set me off.” He looks away. “Tristan believes that I only imagined it.”

“What did he say?” I ask, knowing I’m taking a risky chance here. If Caleb repeats what was said, he might lose himself to the rage again. I can only hope that the calming effect I have on him helps keep the fury at bay.

It’s worked so far. Mostly.

“He said he wished my brother Evan sat on the throne.”

I remember Prince Evan and the scandal of his disappearance. I remember the rumors that swirled around that time, many citing that Caleb had killed him for the throne.

“That name haunts you,” I say.

“As it should,” Caleb says. Lifting his hands in front of him, he stares down at his palms. “I should be haunted for what I’ve done. I murdered my brother.”

“Caleb…”

“And I still don’t know if he deserved it.”

Caleb lifts his hands and buries them in his hair. From his throat, he releases a guttural yell of frustration and pent-up pain.

“I deserve every minute of the torture I’ve suffered since that moment,” he says. “I’m being punished for what I’ve done.”

“That’s not true.”

“You don’t know. You have no idea.”

“So tell me!” I shout. “Why carry the burdens alone? They weigh down on you so much. Why not share them?”

Caleb shakes his head. “I have earned this crown. For Evan to be remembered like this… They do not want me on the throne. They are using him as a symbol for my lack of control. Soon they will attempt to overthrow me again.”

“Who?” I ask.

“Everyone,” he growls.

I try once more to reach out for Caleb, to attempt to soothe him, but he swats my hands away.

“Caleb,” I say.

He shakes his head, shutting me out.

“You could be with them,” he says, his voice twisted and strange.

“I’m not. You know I’m not,” I say. “I’m only on your side.”

“That’s what they all will say.” He looks at me again, and his eyes are wild, flashing red.

His paranoia is growing worse, and I have no idea how to reach him.