Chapter 199

Without even turning, I can feel Caleb’s presence coming toward us. As I did, the people standing nearby all turn to look behind me. Kira herself starts to pale, though she keeps her head high and defiant.

“Mother, you have overstepped for the last time,” Caleb begins to say.

I glance back at Caleb, hoping to convey my hope that he will let me handle this situation, as he had let the commoners deal with the nobles of the court. Similarly to how the commoners needed to stand up for themselves to gain other’s respect, I too want to stand on my own two legs.

Kira has spoken down to me from the start. I couldn’t allow her, or anyone else, to speak to me that way. I wasn’t a slave any longer. I have my own voice. It’s past time I use it to defend myself from people like her. And in doing so, maybe I could help defend others too.

Caleb must see the message I am trying to convey because after looking at me for a moment longer, he subtly nods his head.

With his support, I return my glare back to Kira.

“Dressing as a servant is not an insult. Servants are just people, like any other. Like you and me.”

“I am not like a servant,” Kira snaps.

“Do you not trust them with your food, with your care, and with all of your things?”

“It is their duty to tend to me.”

“Do they not provide you adequate service? Have you not come to depend on them for everything in your life?”

Kira blanches a little, even as her voice takes on an even sharper edge. “That is neither here nor there. They know their place is beneath me.”

“What people wear on the outside does not change the kind of person they are underneath. A servant may not wear flowing gowns as delicate and elaborate as yours, yet they might not need to. Everyone is different of course, but some do not need to wrap themselves in finery to be recognized as decent.”

Kira’s eyes narrow. “How dare you. What are you implying? That a servant could be better than me?”

“Yes,” I say flatly.

Some around us whisper, and not all of them are against me.

“The clothes do not make the person,” someone says.

“Who is this young woman?”

“That’s Harper, the King’s favored consort.”

“She speaks well for herself.”

Kira, however, is not so easily impressed. She snaps, “Do you think yourself decent, Harper? Do you think yourself a lady, hiding among the servants, dressed in their clothes? Let me tell you this. Annabelle is three-times the lady you will ever hope to be. Her beauty and her regality cast a far shadow and you are entirely hidden by it.”

Caleb takes a step toward me, but Kira continues onward, not seeing the threat for what it is.

“Perhaps you are dressed appropriately. Once a slave, always a slave,” Kira says.

Caleb touches my arm, but I shake my head. I don’t need him to intervene. Her words do not hurt me.

I am more aware than anyone of my own personal failings, and of all ways Annabelle is a more refined woman than me. While the engagement was still on, I laid awake, long into the night, making these comparisons for myself. I was failing compared to Annabelle in almost every single way.

Except – I’m the one Caleb desires.

Annabelle is a more regal lady, certainly. From a stronger pack. She has better manners, too.

But most of that is a façade, built up to hide the true person underneath. Occasionally, I saw glimpses of the real Annabelle, but I could never be fully certain what was truly her, and what was the mask she felt she needed to wear to satisfy expectations.

In a way, I feel pity for Annabelle. She is an actress, trapped in a permanent role for the rest of her life.

I would not fall into the same trap, not to satisfy Kira or anyone else.

“I can only be who I am, and nothing more,” I say.

“That’s all I need you to be,” Caleb says, stepping more fully beside me. From our body language alone, it’s clear who he supports in this argument. He takes my arm in his and, looking at me, says, “Who you are is more than enough.”

Some of the gathered crowd swoons a little. Others whisper among each other. Kira’s face goes red as she turns and storms away, pushing roughly past a few people, making a path for herself.

Caleb touches my face and everything else melts away for a while.

Later, as I walk on my way back from the bathroom, I stop when I see Jason, the outspoken commoner, standing in the hallway. He’s leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest, seemingly deep in thought.

I need to walk by him to get to the Hall, at least by the easiest, quickest route. If I go another way, it would be clear that I’m avoiding him.

That Caleb believes these commoners have ties to the rebellion makes me uneasy, but surely Caleb wouldn’t allow them to roam free if he thought they were a danger to me. So, trusting in Caleb, I start toward Jason, trying to keep my nerves under check.

Besides, the presumption of being tied to the rebellion does not make him guilty. I’d just given an entire speech on not judging others by the clothes they wear. I’m no hypocrite.

So I walk by him. Just as I’m about to pass him, he says, “Is it true? Are you the one who was once engaged to the rebellion leader?”

I freeze in my step, turning only my head to look at him.

“What did you say?” I ask, not quite believing my ears.

Yet, as we stare at each other, neither saying a word more, it’s clear that I heard correctly.

After a moment more, he continues, “Harper, I must tell you that –”

“Harper,” snaps an unhappy female voice from behind me.

Jason immediately quiets and we both look.

Kira stands there. Her face isn’t as red with embarrassment and humiliation anymore, though she still glares at me like she wishes her vision could cause me to catch fire.

“I wish to speak with you. Now,” she says.

I have no idea what she could have left to say to me that hasn’t already been said, but I’m not about to cower away from whatever it is. She’s clearly still mad at me personally for how things worked out with Annabelle and Caleb. I’m willing to face that anger head on.

“Say what you have to say, then,” I tell her.

Looking at Jason, Kira clicks her tongue.

Jason turns toward her more fully. He unhooks his arms as he levels her with a pretty intimidating glare, if I’m honest.

Kira stares him down for a moment, but Jason just looks right back. It’s almost unnerving, how little he moves.

Kira gives up first, returning her gaze to me.

“Come with me to my chambers,” Kira replies. “What I have to say to you shouldn’t be overheard by just anyone.”

I have half a mind to argue, but given how embarrassed she had been in front of the court, I suppose I could honor this one request. She is still Caleb’s mother, after all, and the former Luna.

That position deserves some respect, even if I do find her to be personally reprehensible.

“Fine. But only for a moment,” I say. “Caleb will notice if I’m gone over-long.”

“Oh, I assure you, Harper. This won’t take more than a minute.”