Chapter 116

Layla

It was becoming harder to concentrate. Harder to think. Impossible to breathe.

Every passing minute felt like a waste. I needed to get my son back—no matter what it took. And recently, I’ve been feeling the harsh effects of such a heavy notion.

Sinking.

That was the feeling that kept creeping in each time I let myself slip, thinking about Eli and the position I’d put him in.

It’s all my fault. If I had been more guarded from the very beginning—if I hadn’t let the desire for wanting a friend cloud my judgment so much maybe then...

My throat tightened up. I’d lost count of the number of times I felt that horrible ache in my throat and the ongoing tears pricked the corners of my eyes. I couldn’t show weakness.

Not when we were in the midst of putting together a plan. Carlo had easily assured me that this plan we were piercing together was going to work.

“It may cost us a few people,” he said.

“Whatever it takes to get my son back,” I muttered.

I couldn’t allow my mind to become wrapped up in the possible chance of others getting hurt

I was desperate to get my child back. But at the very same time, that feeling was paired with unyielding anger. A sense of rage that I hadn’t felt in years. It made my vision grow tunneled and blurry.

The very line between right and wrong was vastly becoming more and more transparent. The harsh, unbearable weight that was pressing down on my shoulders was crushing me—backing me further into the darkest corner of my mind.

I wanted to let that darker side take over. If it meant surrendering what was left of my morality and ethics to get my son back, then it was a risk I had to take. The pull to fall into this dark unknown was tempting.

Yet, what were the long-term repercussions of slipping into such a state of mind? I didn’t know.

That in itself was terrifying. It was like my own subconscious was repeatedly asking me, how far was I willing to go in order to save my son?

It was suffocating and I was trapped. I had no choice but to match her energy—match her evil. She’d used me to prove herself to her own family as their newly appointed queen.

Vanessa truly thought she had the upper hand. And while it may seem that way at the moment, I was relishing what was to come.

“When I get my hands on that bitch, I want to see the life drain from her eyes,” I muttered to myself.

“You will,” Carlo said.

He and I have been pouring over endless blueprints and drawouts of how we envisioned this mission going down. We’d already lost a good handful of people due to the previous explosions which had brought our initial numbers down quite drastically.

I noticed Aldo’s absence but kept quiet about it. He was just as bothered and upset by this turn of events as anyone else. But I wasn’t quite sure where his mind was at the moment.

“Alright,” I spoke. “That’s enough for now.”

If I looked at any more layouts, my head felt like it was going to split open.

Everyone filed out of the room, one at a time, leaving only Carlo.

“We’re going to get him back, Layla,” he said.

“Can I ask you something?”

The man spoke without hesitation. “Anything.”

“Am I a bad person for wanting Vanessa dead?” I asked coldly.

Carlo actually took a moment to think before answering. He raised his hand to scratch the back of his neck.

“Honestly?” I nodded my head. “No. I think you’re someone who’s been placed in a very difficult spot and is doing whatever is necessary to ensure that nothing gets taken away.”

“I can’t bear the thought of losing either of them,” I admitted.

The pain in my chest returned. It felt like someone had a vice grip on my heart and continuously kept squeezing.

“And you won’t,” he said, affirmably. “You are a Marcello. You have every possible resource at your beck and call. Vanessa Rossetti is nothing more than a desperate upstart. Remember, she’s merely doing this out of obligation to prove her worth to her family.”

“I know,” I muttered.

Vanessa was no different from me in that regard. We were both just trying to prove our worth in the roles we’ve been given. I was now the appointed head of the Marcello family, everyone now looked to me for guidance and direction.

It was a position I never imagined to find myself in. Ever.

But it was one that demanded attention and a willing host. For a brief moment, I came to wonder...Was Vanessa feeling as trapped as I was?

Of course, that same malicious voice from the back of my mind was quick to turn around and snap at me.

Who gives a fuck what she thinks or feels?! She’s crossed a line that only the lowest people in the world would dare. She took my child! She used me like I was nothing but a means to an end.

Another shot of searing pain hit the side of my temple. I closed my eyes and let out a long breath.

“Thank you, Carlo. That will be all for now.”

Later that night, I’d skipped dinner entirely and decided to take an exceptionally long shower. Just because I knew that the thought of sleep wasn’t possible. It also happened to offer a guise for the tears to finally flow freely.

How could I possibly rest when I knew that my Eli wasn’t safe? Would Vanessa be decent enough to at least provide a sleepable bed for him?

I didn’t want to keep thinking about it. But it was nearly impossible. When I finally got out, I reached for a towel and began mindlessly drying myself off.

I made the mistake of glancing into the mirror and caught my reflection. Yikes.

My eyes were puffy and red from having cried out what little emotion I had left. The rest of me didn’t look too decent either.

Whatever.

I grabbed an oversized shirt and threw it over my head before stepping out of the bathroom. I stopped short when I noticed Aldo waiting for me.

He was leaning up against the far wall with his head down and his arm folded across his chest. He seemed to be in some kind of deep thought.

“Where were you?” I asked.

He glanced up from the floor to find my searching gaze.

“Just a meeting.”

My brows pinched. Just a meeting? Since when was he bent on keeping things from me? Then it occurred to me, it was likely because he knew that whoever he met up with was going to irritate me.

“You met with Ethan, didn’t you?”

A long moment of silence fell between us. Alod pushed himself off the wall and stepped closer.

“Yes,” he said. “I met with Ethan.”

“Why?” I questioned sharply.

“Because I still think that there’s a way we could save Eli without having to draw blood.”

The corner of my eye twitched. I clenched my jaw and struggled to press down the anger that was fighting its way to come out.