Chapter 1

Eight years together, and I'd hinted at marriage more times than I could count.

I'd even booked the venue in Hawaii, just like we'd promised each other years ago.

He played dumb.

Then he took the trip for two I'd been hoping for and handed it, without a second thought, to a young intern.

Something in me went quiet for good.

So I disappeared, cleanly and completely.

He spent the next month out of town at a conference, with the intern in tow. It was almost over before he noticed that I'd blocked him everywhere.

He was sitting in his hotel room, irritable, when his phone rang.

A friend, a few drinks in, was complaining on the other end. "Man, that's cold. You got married and didn't invite me? I had to find out from Chloe's Instagram!"

He went still. His hand was shaking a little when he asked for screenshots.

The screen lit up. The location tag said Hawaii.

In the photo, I was standing on the sand in a white wedding dress.

For a moment, his mind went completely blank.

————

The ballroom of a five-star hotel in Midtown Manhattan blazed under its crystal chandeliers.

Tonight was the annual gala for the medical tech company my best friend Mia had started with her fiancé, Lucas.

Up on the stage, Ethan, an attending surgeon at NewYork-Presbyterian, had just finished his speech and was walking down the steps, perfectly at ease.

When he passed the intern Tiffany's seat, he stopped as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

He handed her an envelope. Inside was a voucher for a trip for two to Hawaii.

"Here," he said, smiling, with a look that was a little too indulgent.

Tiffany lit up.

She took the envelope in both hands, her voice bright and loud enough to carry. "Thank you, Chief! You saved the best prize for me? I could marry you right now just to say thank you!"

She snapped him a playful little salute.

Then she straightened up and added, testing the waters, "Too bad I don't have anyone to go with. Since you're being so generous, Chief, why don't you come with me?"

The air around us went still for a beat. Then came a few knowing laughs.

Beside me, Mia shot to her feet, ready to march up there and have it out.

I caught her by the wrist and pulled her back into her chair, forcing a light smile. "You're still such a hothead. Ethan's not going to say yes."

The words were barely out when I heard him laugh. "Depends on how your work goes from here."

"Yes, sir!" Tiffany stood at exaggerated attention, and people laughed.

Ethan couldn't help grinning. He patted her shoulder and headed back toward me.

"What the hell," Mia hissed in my ear. "Is she playing dumb or is she actually dumb? The four of us have been together for eight years! We promised in college, a double wedding in Hawaii! Lucas and I already booked the venue! And he brings his intern and flirts with her in front of everyone?"

She was getting angrier by the second.

I laid my hand over hers. "Sit down. Calm down. Ethan's just joking around."

Ethan sat back down next to me and seemed to sense something was off.

He took my hand and lowered his voice. "Hawaii's overrated anyway. It's all tourists. When I get time off at the end of the year, I'll take you to Colorado to see the snow."

I slid my hand out of his without looking at him. "Don't worry about it. You've got your own things going on."

He blinked, then awkwardly pulled his hand back.

A little later, Lucas was called up to the stage as the company's founder.

When the host asked about his plans for the second half of the year, Lucas rubbed his chin as if he were holding on to a big secret, then broke into a grin. "Next month, I'm getting married in Hawaii!"

The room erupted. He turned to our table and found Mia, and his voice softened. "To my very own drill sergeant. Here's to a lifetime of loving each other and driving each other crazy."

Laughter and applause filled the room.

Then Lucas turned toward Ethan and held out his hand, completely sincere. "Bro, what do you say? Want to make it a double?"

Every spotlight in the room swung to our table.

I turned to look at Ethan, and the last small spark of hope I had flickered.

With every eye on him, Ethan laughed and waved it off like a joke. "A wedding's not a buy-one-get-one deal. You guys go test the waters first. I'll get back to you."

He said it so easily.

Lucas rubbed his nose, embarrassed, and moved on with his speech.

And the last bit of hope I had went out, and after that there was only quiet.

•   *   *

After the gala, Ethan drove me home.

We could see Tiffany from a block away, standing alone outside the hotel entrance. The night wind was pressing her dress against her legs.

Ethan rolled down the window. Tiffany's face lit up and she ran over. "Chief, you can't get a ride at this hour."

Ethan glanced at the back seat, then at me. "We'll give you a lift."

"Oh, I couldn't. Chloe's here," Tiffany said, pressing her lips together. Her feet didn't move.

"It's on the way." Ethan turned to me. "I'll drop you off first, then take her home."

I nodded.

The whole ride, Tiffany chattered like a little sparrow, going on and on about ER gossip.

I listened to all those names I didn't know and felt like an outsider in my own boyfriend's car.

When we got to my building, Ethan leaned over. "Go on up. I'll drop her off and be right back."

I said okay and walked away.

At the lobby door, I glanced back without meaning to.

Under the streetlight, the black car was still idling.

Through the windshield, I could see that Tiffany had somehow ended up in the passenger seat. She was leaning forward, tugging on Ethan's sleeve, telling him something with great excitement.

A second later, the car swung around and drove off in the opposite direction from the one we'd come.