Less Than A Dog

After the seventh time Russell abandoned Marnie and me for Wren Cole’s dog, we finally learned to not make a fuss.

He paraded Wren and that Golden Retriever around like a family.

They trended on social media and graced the covers of equestrian magazines.

I didn't say a word.

When he ripped up Marnie’s favorite sketchbook to line Duke’s dog bed, my daughter didn’t even cry.

That was until that damn dog chased Marnie down the stairs.

She hit her head, got a concussion, and was rushed to the ER.

Only then did Russell finally show up.

"Rachel! Why didn't you call me?" he yelled, storming down the hospital corridor. "I'm Marnie's father too!"

I had been sitting outside the emergency room all night.

I looked up at him, my voice completely deadpan.

"It's nothing major. Just a mild concussion. "

"They'll keep her for observation for a couple of days, then she can go home."

"I know how busy you are. Marnie understands."

Russell froze.

"A concussion is serious, and you’re telling me it’s nothing? What kind of mother are you?"

He was about to explode, but the whispers from his PR assistants, who had followed him into the ward, stopped him in his tracks.

"Russell and Wren are such a better match. If Wren hadn't left for Europe back then, a nobody like Rachel wouldn't have stood a chance."

"Seriously. She doesn't even fit in, and she can't even watch her own kid."

Russell scowled. "Wren and I are strictly professional. I just see her as a little sister!"

I gave a slow nod.

"I believe you."

"Prince chased Marnie down the stairs. I know that dog is Wren's whole world. I didn't dare tell you. I didn't want to put you in a tough spot."

A flicker of guilt crossed Russell's face.

"I'll get Marnie the best pediatric neurologist in the state." He paused, rubbing his neck. "Prince is Wren's emotional support, Rachel. You know she struggles with her mental health."

"I understand, Mr. Rainer," I said evenly. "Don't worry. In the future, I'll teach Marnie to just call you 'Uncle Russell'."

Panic flashed in his eyes.

"If you're mad, just yell at me! Stop acting like this and dragging our daughter into your passive-aggressive games!"

I nodded again.

"Okay. I understand."

I wasn't going to yell. I wasn't going to make a scene ever again.

Our tickets were already booked. In five days, we would be completely out of his life forever.

Marnie woke up in the middle of the night.

The very first words out of her mouth were, "Mommy, don't tell Daddy I'm in the hospital. I'm afraid he'll be mad at me."

Russell happened to be pushing the door open at that exact moment. He heard it.

His voice tightened as he walked over to the bed. "Marnie, Daddy doesn't need to stay with Prince. Daddy is staying right here with you."

Marnie looked at him for a long moment, then shrank back behind me. "Uncle Russell."

In an instant, Russell's face turned paler than our daughter's.

He opened his mouth to say something, but his phone rang.

Wren's tearful voice blared through the speaker.

"Russell, Prince threw up. Please come check on him. I'm so scared."

He looked at his daughter in the hospital bed, then down at his phone.

"Wait for me. I'll be right back."

He quickly tucked the blankets around Marnie. "Daddy will bring you a strawberry cake."

Marnie didn't say a word.

She was allergic to dairy. Ever since she was little, I had to scrape every bit of buttercream frosting off her treats.

He never remembered.

He walked away fast.

Marnie stared at the empty doorway and suddenly asked, "Mommy, does Uncle not like me?"

I stroked her hair. "It's not that he doesn't like you, sweetie. He just found something he likes more."

In the early hours of the morning, Wren posted an Instagram story.

[With you here, I'm not afraid of anything.]

The photo was a side profile of Russell feeding medicine to Prince.

His brow was furrowed, looking totally focused and gentle.

I liked the post.

On the day Marnie was discharged, Russell didn't come to pick us up.

It wasn't until we got home that I realized he hadn't just skipped picking us up—he had given our master bedroom to Wren and Prince.

Our belongings were packed into two suitcases, sitting outside the small north guest room.

I stood downstairs, watching Aunt Maggie take down our large wedding portrait.

After hanging there for eight years, it left a faded, pale rectangle on the wall.

Russell walked by just in time to catch the heavy frame.

I thought he was going to say something to me.

Instead, he just wiped the dust off his sleeve and handed it back to the housekeeper.

"Put it in the old stone storage shed on the estate. Don't chip the frame."

Then, he turned to me to explain. "Seeing our wedding photos might trigger Wren's trauma. Just be the bigger person."

I looked at him.

"Russell, if I keep being the bigger person until the very end, what will I have left?"

He thought about it for a second.

"You'll still have me."

That night, in a rare domestic mood, he cooked for me. It was a homemade tomato soup.

He had learned the recipe years ago, just for me.

I had barely picked up my spoon when Wren came downstairs, Prince trailing behind her. "That smells amazing."

Russell slid my cup over to her.

"Eat this first. There's more on the stove."

There wasn't any more on the stove. He had only made one serving.

Wren took two bites, then placed it directly on the floor.

"Prince wants some too."

It was my mother's vintage porcelain teacup. I sat there, watching the dog bury his snout in it and lick it clean.

Russell didn't stop them. He actually chuckled. "Slow down, buddy. No one's taking it from you."

I stood up and went upstairs.

Marnie was waiting for me in the guest room. She dug into her little backpack and pulled out half a blueberry muffin.

"Mommy, they gave out snacks at school. I saved this for you."

The muffin was already stale and dry.

I ate it anyway, washing it down with hot water.

Russell came into the room later that night, wrapping his arms around me from behind.

"Don't be mad at me. Once Wren's mental health improves, I'll send them away. We'll go back to how things used to be."

I didn't pull away.I only nodded.

"Okay.”

He had no idea that Marnie and I had already stopped waiting for him.