If Loving You Means My Ruin

I was raped by a man in the marital home I shared with my husband.

My name is Helen Smith. Two weeks ago, I married into the Carter family, the wealthiest household in Seavale, becoming the young mistress of a powerful dynasty.

Another exhausting day had passed, and I only managed to fall asleep late into the night. Ever since entering the Carter household, my spirit had been worn thin—constantly navigating my mother-in-law’s relentless scrutiny and my sister-in-law’s petty schemes, struggling to survive in the cracks. The bitter irony was that this marriage had been my own desperate pursuit, leaving me no choice but to resign myself to fate.

Half-asleep, I felt as though a boulder was pressing down on me, suffocating my breath. Something cool brushed against my lips, and an unfamiliar scent flooded my nostrils.

Frowning in my daze, I instinctively parted my lips, only for something warm and wet to slip inside, swirling possessively.

The taste was faint, laced with a hint of minty sweetness. My sluggish mind couldn’t process it fast enough, and for a moment, I found myself tangled in the sensation.

Then, abruptly, the kiss deepened into something suffocating, and I finally snapped to awareness. I jerked in panic, trying to sit up—only to realize my limbs were pinned down by an unyielding force. My eyes flew open in terror, but a thick palm clamped over them before I could see a thing.

A man. A man had broken into my room and was assaulting me in my sleep!

I opened my mouth to scream, but a hot breath ghosted over my earlobe, followed by a low, mocking whisper.

"Don’t. Do you really want everyone to know a man climbed into the bed of a living widow?"

His voice was smooth, unfamiliar—and it sent chills down my spine. "Who are you?" I trembled. "What do you want?"

"What do I want?" He chuckled darkly, pinning my wrists as his teeth grazed the hollow of my neck. "What else but you?"

Terror seized me. I tried to wrench away.

"Let me go! This is the Carter family—do you have a death wish?"

A silken scarf wound around my eyes, blinding me. His hand muffled my mouth as his weight pressed me deeper into the mattress, his strength overwhelming. His fingers traced my skin, and though I couldn’t see, I felt his dominance—his complete control. A cold rush of air brushed my body, and then fabric was shoved between my lips, silencing me.

Who is he?! How did he get in?! What does he want?!

No! Help! Let me go!

I tried to scream, but the cloth stuffed in my mouth muffled my cries into desperate whimpers. I thrashed with all my strength, but it was useless—he overpowered me effortlessly, forcing my legs apart.

No, no! Tears of shame streamed down my face as I fought back, only for my wrists to be bound tightly. Then, he flipped me over.

Help…! It hurts!

He forced himself inside me, the searing pain wrenching a sob from my throat. I trembled, whimpering in terror, struggling helplessly.

No! Let me go!

"Stop moving!" the man growled, biting my shoulder in warning. "You want everyone to see the Carter family’s young mistress getting raped? Huh? I’ve got it all on camera. Scream, and I’ll ruin you."

With that, his movements grew even more brutal.

Please, stop…! Someone, help me!

How? How could this be happening? I shook violently, tears soaking my face, but my muffled cries only seemed to excite him further. He drove into me harder, as if unleashing some twisted rage, tormenting me, humiliating me.

I was raped.

In the Carter family’s mansion—the wealthiest household in the city. In the very bedroom I shared with my husband.

How could this happen? Please, let me go…

The violation seemed endless. I cried until my voice gave out, but in the end, the pain was too much. Darkness swallowed me whole.